Letitgo community

Struggling to cope

I’ve spent the weekend with my friends, not thinking about him and just checked in with him once. I’ve been fine but now I’m home I’m a mess and I’m really finding it hard to manage. He doesn’t want to see me tonight and I don’t understand why. This feeling is insufferable. The only thing that helps me cope is going out late at night on a drive or a run so that by the time I get home I just sleep. Even then I feel empty and constantly think he might ask to meet me. What can I do? it feels like nothing is going to help me through this

Comments (4)

Nilombo
Nilombo 58 mins ago

distraction helps for a bit but the crash after always hurts more. i started writing down what i wanted to say to him instead of sending it — kinda became my late night ritual.

rulehonest
rulehonest 4 hrs ago

i used to drive around for hours after my breakup too, just to avoid the silence. it’s like your body finally stops moving and all the emotions hit at once

LuckyCharm674
LuckyCharm674 20 hrs ago

Would I have gone back ? hard to tell, but if there was a possibility, she killed it by messaging me.
That's not the fact that she messaged me. That's the fact that she didn't respect my need for space and couldn't control the impulse to message me...

happy9
happy9 20 hrs ago

hearing that makes me want to leave him alone so badly. I just don’t know if I’m strong enough. I know I’m ruining my chances but I do it anyway

LuckyCharm674
LuckyCharm674 20 hrs ago

@happy9 so stop, seriously! I know it's hard and it"s a battle for me too, but on the long run, I know it s the right thing to do.
I cannot believe what I'm amour to write, but it works for me : when you feel the urge to message him, go and "talk" to Gemini, the Google AI app. Tell "him/her/it" what you re going through. It helps me to destroy this impulse to message her, because Gemini gives me good reasons not to do so..

happy9
happy9 19 hrs ago

@LuckyCharm674 yeah I’ve seen lots of people recommend talking to ai. I’m going to really try this week. I really appreciate your advice!!

LuckyCharm674
LuckyCharm674 19 hrs ago

@happy9 You re welcome. good luck from France !

LuckyCharm674
LuckyCharm674 20 hrs ago

You're saying : he doesn't want to see me. Did you break up ? If that's the case, that's pretty normal... If not, well, you're gonna have to have a talk...

happy9
happy9 20 hrs ago

we did break up but ‘to work on ourselves’ in hopes we could get back together. hence why we might occasionally see each other. I know it’s not healthy but he’s giving mixed signals of whether he actually wants a future or not

LuckyCharm674
LuckyCharm674 20 hrs ago

@happy9 when did you break up ?
If it was less than.a month ago, give him time to miss you...

happy9
happy9 20 hrs ago

@LuckyCharm674 it was less than a month. I’m trying my hardest to leave him alone but it’s such a struggle. i can’t cope with the pain

LuckyCharm674
LuckyCharm674 20 hrs ago

@happy9 I know what it's like, I'm currently in the same boat...
But remembre : if you don't give him the space he asked/needs, things will never go back to "normal". It's hard and painfull, but you don"t gave a choice.
4 years ago, I left my girlfriend and she texted me, asked to see me, was desperate. Believe me, each text pushed mu further away. Time and silence are your friends...

LuckyCharm674
LuckyCharm674 20 hrs ago

sorry for the typos !

happy9
happy9 20 hrs ago

@LuckyCharm674 would you have gone back if she didn’t do that?

I know what you’re saying is the truth I just can’t help but message him when I feel sick to my stomach with upset… but I also have hope because he doesn’t always say no and he does reply. so while the option is there I can’t not take it if there’s a chance