When I was in middle school

When I was in middle school, there was a girl I quietly fell for. Her eyes sparkled in the sunlight, and her smile lit up every room. She excelled in her studies, was loved by everyone, and was simply beautiful. I admired her from afar, knowing I’d never have a chance and keeping my feelings to myself.
I was an average student, shy and friendless, with no real social life. The one thing I loved was drawing, and I would often sketch her in my textbook, which made me smile to myself like an idiot. But one day, my classmates found these sketches, and rumors started to spread. Her cousin, who happened to be my friend, surprised me by not joining in on the gossip and instead offering support, knowing my feelings were genuine.
Then, one day, she stopped coming to school. When I asked around, I learned she had transferred to another school. After that, my grades began slipping because I couldn’t focus. Where was the person I cared about so deeply? One of my teachers knew about my situation and often made rude remarks using her name, which only hurt me further. This gave me the determination to change; I wanted to be someone worthy of her, to marry her one day and share a happy life together. I loved her, despite the distance and the silence.
After a few months of hard work, I finally made it into the top three of my class, surprising everyone with my sudden improvement. But even then, I wasn’t satisfied. I wanted to keep improving, and when I heard from a friend that she was transferring back to our school due to family issues, I was thrilled. I decided once again to keep my feelings to myself, convinced she was out of my league and with no way to contact her. We never spoke, yet I thought I could see a feeling for me in her eyes.
I kept telling myself that tomorrow would be the day I’d tell her how I felt. But days turned into weeks, weeks into months, and months into years, and I still never found the courage to confess.
A few years later, I found out that she now had a boyfriend—one of our old classmates. That day, I felt I’d lost everything. The person I’d become for her wasn’t enough, and she’d chosen someone else. I cried and blamed myself for not confessing earlier, thinking maybe she’d waited for me too. Despite knowing she was with someone else, my feelings didn’t fade. I completed high school with good grades, made wonderful friends, and collected happy memories. I received several proposals, but I rejected them all because a part of me was still holding on to her.
Years passed, and I enrolled in university to continue my studies. I heard from a friend that she and her boyfriend had broken up, but I told myself it didn’t matter. I tried to put my past behind me and look forward. But the truth was, I still loved her, though I no longer needed her. I realized I couldn’t make her love me, and instead, I felt grateful. She had inspired me to become the person I am today, and for that, I’ll always be thankful. As I look out my window at the sunset, I feel at peace, appreciating the beauty that surrounds me.

Last updated on:2024-11-12T17:30:54+05:30