It’s been a week since she told me we needed to break up

It’s been a week since she told me we needed to break up. She said her mind was all over the place, and she couldn’t think straight. I tried to talk her out of it even offered to help her figure things out, but she said she wasn’t in the right headspace. So I agreed, even though it crushed me. I’ve been trying to move on, but it’s been rough. I tried to win her back too—really tried—but all she said was “If you want to wait I’ll let you, but I don’t know when things will go back to how they were. If you meet someone else I won’t stop you. I told her I’ll wait. I’ve waited 21 years for you you’re my first and my only. She promised there was no one else and I believed her.
At first, we still talked, but she started pulling away. Her replies got cold, so I asked my friends to talk to her. They said she felt suffocated and that I was too clingy, which hurt, but I kind of get it. The thing is, she’s the one who wanted daily video calls. She even sulked if I waited too long to call her so I became her alarm clock calling to wake her up because she said it comforted her. I thought maybe I was the problem so I tried to adjust. I brought it up again later hoping to fix things but she had already made up her mind.
Then before we broke up there was this meet-up with our group of friends but I couldn’t go because of classes. Later my friends told me they suspected she cheated on me with someone from the group. I confronted her and at first she denied it but eventually she admitted it. She said, I don’t want to lie to you anymore. Yes we kissed and after our date he insisted on taking me to the bus station. She cheated. Oddly enough I didn’t feel anything when she said it.
That night I couldn’t sleep. My head was a mess full of questions and doubts. The next day I offered her another chance but she refused. She said she couldn’t look me in the eye and was disgusted with herself. I told her I’d help her get through this but she didn’t want my help. She said my attempts to fix things made her guilt worse. Her words stuck with me: I wanted you to be my forever too but I don’t know why I did it. She asked me to stop caring for her because it was hurting her so I did.
Thankfully my friends had my back. They didn’t let her or the other guy off easy asking them to take a step back. My friends were there when I was at my lowest and I’m so grateful. I’m doing better now but I’m not fully okay yet. I still miss her and the connection we had but the pain isn’t as sharp anymore. What I feel now is mostly disappointment—at her for giving in to temptation and at him because he knew she was taken, and I thought he was my friend.
I’m trying to move forward. Spending time with friends helps with the loneliness but I also take moments alone to accept reality. Yesterday I found out they’re still talking. I warned her about him—he’s got way too many red flags—but she said If he hurts me it’s karma for what I did to you. I offered to help her again but she refused. My friends told me to let her figure it out for now so I’m trying to back off, even though I still care.
As for the guy he’s a walking red flag. He told my friends he liked her even when we were just talking and he was seeing someone else at the time. He’s been with multiple girls and he lied to each one about his past. I told her this but she’s in a bad place right now and doesn’t seem to care. My friends say to let them be but it’s hard to watch her hurt herself.
Even though she messed up she did a lot to make our relationship work too. It’s just mistakes happen and if not now maybe later one of us would’ve messed up anyway. I’d be lying if I said I didn’t want her back, but I’m disappointed she didn’t even try to fix things when I did. She left me hanging reaching for her and she didn’t take my hand.

Last updated on:2024-11-21T17:08:31+05:30