For the most part I’m doing better now

For the most part I’m doing better now. My mental health is still kinda fragile but honestly I’m doing better than I was before her. I reconnected with some old friends and they’ve been a solid support system. I’ve even started talking to new girls and went on a date once.
But now she’s started showing up to church stuff again (she legit disappeared for months—like even her friends and family had no clue where she was). She’s bringing her fiancé too who for some reason hates me. Sometimes she’ll walk up to talk to someone I’m with and I’ll just fully turn away avoid eye contact and wait for her to leave. Months ago, before she disappeared I texted her saying I didn’t want to stay friends and all she said was ok. I thought that was pretty clear—I don’t wanna talk to her and there’s no reason she’d care anyway.
But nope. Eventually she decides to say hi uses my name and asks how I’ve been. She even introduced her fiancé. (Last time I just hit her with short dry answers to not start drama but next time I’m straight-up telling her I don’t wanna talk.) She acts like nothing happened like we’re all good but nah we’re not. I’m not about to unpack everything she did but in short—she lied to me about big stuff blindsided me over a small argument and probably cheated the whole time.
What’s worse is the trauma she left me with is creeping back. I’ll be doing something random and out of nowhere I feel anxious and hopeless like nothing’s gonna get better. Then I realize it’s just because I saw her a few days ago.
I mean it’s better than her still treating me like trash but it still sucks. I don’t even know why it hurts so much i don’t want it to. I just wanna move on and stop worrying about her. Feels unfair that I’m the one left alone dealing with all this trauma while she gets to jump into a new relationship whenever she wants like none of it matters. No consequences no apology nothing.
She’s acting like we’re cool and tries to be friendly but I’ve made it clear I don’t wanna talk to her. The trauma she caused still hits me sometimes and while I’m mostly fine this is the one thing that still gets to me.

Last updated on:2024-12-18T14:55:57+05:30