It's a bit of a long story but I'll keep it short I fell for this girl in my class at the start of the year

It's a bit of a long story but I'll keep it short
I fell for this girl in my class at the start of the year. We started talking more and more had a ton in common and our vibe was just right. She was literally the most beautiful person I'd ever met everything about her was perfect. She had a boyfriend at the time they’d been together for like a year and it was her first relationship.
But we got closer became friends talked a lot mostly through school’s private chatrooms no flirting unless you count teasing as flirting. I tease everyone a bit that’s just how I talk. Things were going well but I started feeling more than just friendship. When I wasn’t in class I felt off like my mind would always go to her. It became super distracting like I couldn’t think about anything else. I started liking the stuff she liked music movies games all of it. When she was absent I felt down.
I’m pretty private and opening up isn’t easy for me so I never told her how I felt. I hoped I wouldn’t have to at least not yet. We stayed good friends for months but never hung out after school mostly because our studies were intense and I was too scared to ask her. We didn’t have all the same classes but I’d go visit her class during breaks.
I started noticing stuff like her relationship wasn’t as perfect as it seemed. She’d say stuff like how she’d miss the class but I thought she just meant the whole group. Then towards the end I realized she probably meant everyone. I was deep into my feelings for her she was all I could think about. When I thought about the future I couldn’t imagine it without her. But I didn’t have her number or social media so I didn’t think I needed it at the time. I invited her to my place for a graduation hangout but she said she’d come if she wasn’t working. When I asked for her number to stay in touch after graduation her answer kinda crushed me. Her boyfriend had basically forbidden her from talking to anyone in the class.
Even then I still had hope. We all celebrated and I hung out with her and everyone else. Later one of our mutual friends who’s super observan said she’d been staring at me the whole night and probably liked me back. I didn’t know how to react but it stuck with me. The night ended with everyone saying goodbye and I feared it was the last time I’d see her.
We still chatted for a bit after graduation but then she told me she had to cut contact because of her boyfriend. That text hit hard. I knew it was coming but it still hurt. That summer was honestly the worst. I heard she cut contact with other people too but I also heard she probably liked me. That didn’t help though. I thought about telling her how I felt but I didn’t. I just tried to move on but part of me still hoped.
Then months later she reached out. She’d broken up with her boyfriend and wanted to talk again. It was music to my ears. We started texting and for a minute I thought maybe something could happen. But I was still too scared to tell her didn’t wanna risk our friendship. Over time I started feeling worse like I had to do something about it or I’d go crazy. I thought of a way to hang out but it had been months since I last saw her and I wasn’t sure I could handle it.
Then one day, she casually mentioned her boyfriend in a text, and that crushed whatever hope I had left. She’d probably worked things out with him and I just felt everything fall apart.
Now I’ve realized it was probably all just a dream. I didn’t say anything when she was in a relationship because it didn’t feel right and then when she was single I didn’t think they’d get back together. I didn’t wanna rush anything. Now I’m just thinking if I should say something to her stay friends or cut ties and move on. Because she’d always remind me of what I couldn’t have and of one of the best yet worst years of my life.
She was everything to me and now I don’t know...

Last updated on:2024-12-27T16:55:29+05:30