exactly two months ago my ex boyfriend broke up with me out of the blue. we were planning a trip together, he met my closest relatives that weren't introduced to him yet and slept with me the day before he told me he thought he didn't have any feelings for me anymore. i felt betrayed, disgusted, used, and blocked him everywhere.
we have friends in common though, and sometimes just their presence in my life ignites deepest fears. ive told them not to tell me anything about him, but i find myself reading too much into what they say, don't say, what they do and don't do and granting it meaning.
rn i have a deep fear my ex bf may be with someone else, not because i have any rational certainty, even less info, but i am constantly interpreting how my friends interact with me as "proof" and convincing myself it's a hunch.
my question is, how do i deal with this? what have you done in my place? thinking about him with someone new doesn't work, it actually makes me want to reach out or unblock him just to prove it. i feel like im losing my mind.
Last updated on:2025-10-30T02:55:03+05:30
Comments (3)
have you told your friends how triggering it is when they mention him, even casually? like, do they know how heavy it feels for you right now?
when my mind used to spiral like that, i started grounding myself by noticing what’s actually happening, not what i’m assuming. like, writing it down helped what i know vs what i’m imagining. it doesn’t fix it right away, but it slows the chaos down a bit.
my ex did something so similar — planned trips, made promises, and then just switched off overnight. i remember thinking i’d lose it trying to decode every little thing my friends said too. it’s like your brain won’t stop searching for closure that never came