I am 50 days without any direct contact with my ex, and that's getting easier as the time passes.
i started this count to see how much i'd last without searching any *indirect* contact, and although that's been much more difficult, i was in a 14 days streak.
sadly today a few hours ago i started watching old ig stories and i realized that i'd see him in them and i kept watching anyways. it wasn't a conscious choice but i must be honest with myself and re-start the count bc i want to know how much could i go without any stimulus regarding him.
the reason i'm posting is that i want to make clear somewhere that i went 2 weeks clean, and im proud of it, and im sure now things will get easier because i know that i can avoid searching answers in him and remind myself my past self deserves much better and my future self already has it !
Last updated on:2025-11-10T23:36:13+05:30
Comments (5)
do you ever notice what triggers that urge to look him up? like is it loneliness, curiosity, or just missing who you were back then?
i think it's a mix of all of that tbh, but also the fear of being proved unworthy. i know it doesn't make sense bc him suffering doesn't mean i was worth something, but it feels like that. im working on it haha
the fact that you’re tracking it and being honest with yourself says a lot. the urge fades with time, i promise. keep focusing on the part of you that wants peace more than answers.
❤️❤️❤️
i remember restarting my own no contact count more times than i can admit but yeah, even the slip ups count as progress. you’re aware. that’s growth already.