I (F27) had been with my (ex) bf (M25) for almost 2 years and he was talking about proposing and marrying me by next year. but like a few weeks ago he changed. he said he was stressed from working at home and being alone. he started hanging with old friends and got close to this girl said it made him happy. he felt guilty and told me. he also said he was thinking about why he felt happy with her and not with me.
then he told me i don’t pay enough attention to him. i was upset obviously but i tried to do better with the small talk and engage more. but still i didn’t meet his expectations. apparently i didn’t ask the specific question he was hoping i would so he got frustrated and decided not to talk about it anymore since i got upset.
then he wanted more. he wanted me to buy him stuff sometimes so i did. got him the jersey he always wanted and some legos. things seemed better for a bit.but then i got tired and needed something back from him like affection and appreciation which had been missing for a while. i told him how upset i was and how much i needed him to make me feel loved. he said he was stressed and needed space. i gave him space but this time i really left him alone.
we met up later and things were better like we were talking and hanging out with friends. but on the way home we had the talk i had planned. i didn’t expect him to end things. he said he felt like he had changed so much for me. i told him that’s what relationships are you compromise. but he said he wasn’t ready for that and wasn’t sure about forever with me.i was crushed i even asked if there was anything we could do but he still ended things and i agreed because why should i beg someone who doesn’t wanna be with me?
i keep wondering what i did wrong. i tried my best i really did and he still left. did he just stop having feelings for me? i don’t get it.
i thought when two people love each other and want it to work it would. but i guess he didn’t want it as much as i did huh? i feel so dumb.
Last updated on:2025-01-02T17:11:47+05:30
Comments (5)
Sorry but yeah I had to break up with my ex this weekend. He’s fighting the urge to be out there and hook up with other people.
Proud of you for walking away instead of twisting yourself to make it work. So many of us do that and it never ends well.
From what I've been through it’s not on you. He’s just chasing something else thinking he’ll find it somewhere else. Doesn’t mean you’re not enough you are. His wants just shifted people change. That’s why relationships can be so hard. You can’t control others only give it your all. You did your part played it right. Whether he matched your energy or not isn’t on you. You gave your best now it’s about learning healing, leveling up, and moving on. It’s not easy I feel you I’m in the middle of it too. Just got divorced, not by choice.
Babe he’s just chasing that infatuation phase. It’s that quick spark you feel with someone new but it doesn’t last. Science even backs this up your brain pumps out feel good chemicals like you're on a high. A lot of guys get hooked on that rush and aren’t really about building something real. It’s like an addiction.
He probably feels guilty and was kinda hoping you’d call it quits so he could bounce to this new girl. He kept shifting the vibes but nothing you did would’ve given him those fresh butterfly feels like someone new does.
Yeah I get it but this goes both ways it’s not just a guy or girl thing when it comes to chasing that love high. Love takes effort and sacrifice you don’t just dip when stuff gets tough.