never thought marriage was for me till i met her.. y’all don’t get it this woman changed my whole life.. i was and still am so in love with her it’s actually painful.. one morning she just woke up told me she wasn’t happy and said she needed to stay at her mom’s for the night before we talked more.. spent the whole day spiraling trying to keep it together bc i really thought we could talk thru it.. we always did before.. after years together barely ever fighting i really held onto the hope that i still meant as much to her as she did to me just the day before..
there’s nothing i wouldn’t have said or done to fix it.. to understand what was making her so unhappy and how i could change it.. i thought she just needed to see real change but nah i was wrong.. i think she already knew she was never coming back when she left that day.. don’t get why she had to drag it out and make me wait 24 hours when she could’ve just ripped the bandaid off.. she came back grabbed all her stuff down to the toilet brush and completely cut me off.. it’s been a month and five days now..
and bro i’m struggling.. before this relationship i already had trauma that led to cptsd and the worst abandonment issues but i was managing yk meds therapy all that.. now i’ve lost almost 30 pounds i don’t wanna get out of bed and every day i think about just ending it.. haven’t relapsed but it sounds more tempting every day.. breakups suck no matter what but i was already barely holding on and now the one person i loved most in the world wants nothing to do with me.. acts like i disgust her.. she said she wants to find herself drink less grow up more which i get but like i would’ve supported her through all of that.. she didn’t have to cut me out completely unless she just didn’t love me anymore..
so yeah here i am crying into my screen bc i spend most of my time alone.. my closest friend still talks to her which hurts too much.. i have some good people around me but no one i can really open up to.. and even if i could i just don’t have it in me anymore.. i feel like a shell of who i used to be just going through the motions at work with no real hope for myself.. i feel so insanely lonely.. i need this pain to stop and i don’t see a future where it does.. honestly i don’t even wanna feel better i just wanna feel nothing
Last updated on:2025-02-04T13:51:51+05:30
Comments (8)
first off big hug 🤗 and all the strength to keep pushing thru till one day u wake up n it’s actually a good day. can’t even imagine how tough this is for u rn feeling so alone
u got a pet? like a dog or a cat? my cat is literally the sweetest lil weirdo n always knows when i’m sad she’ll come cuddle n fuss over me. if u can’t have one fulltime maybe fostering? dogs especially r great cuz they make u get up go outside move around plus u end up talking to other dog ppl at the park. animals really keep u in the moment n bring so much joy
that’s rough. I kinda relate—my ex of years dipped on me over something I swear we could’ve fixed if we just talked it out.
She straight-up ghosted me for 2 weeks then basically ended things over social media. She promised we'd talk in person had me waiting almost 2 months for closure then still broke up with me. The way she left hurt like hell but honestly I never hated her for it.
The first few weeks after the breakup were brutal. I lost my appetite could barely function at work and my sleep was wrecked. I'd crash for a bit then wake up in the middle of the night and just stare at the ceiling. At one point I even hit a really dark place.
How’d I get through it? Honestly, just accepting it, reflecting on everything, and letting myself fully feel the heartbreak. No shortcuts just riding it out.
Fast forward to now—I’m down 13kg been hitting the gym consistently for 3 months. My appetite's back but I’m keeping a strict diet. Also got into reading daily gospel (no worries if that’s not your thing). Emotionally still no hate for her i just wish her the best. Being single again is weird but I see it as a journey to level up and find myself again. Not rushing into anything just learning new things—cooking video editing maybe even drumming.
There’s always hope. Pain is part of it but don’t let it swallow you whole. Just take it one step at a time you’ll get there.
Ah the classic switch-up smh so sorry dude fr this is exactly why I got trust issues with romance
so sorry OP time's the only thing that’ll heal u
she really took.. the toilet brush??
I know.
im really sorry youre going through this i know it hurts so bad right now i wish i had the right words to make it better but i dont tbh when im in that dark place all the usual breakup advice just doesnt hit maybe one day things will feel okay again but for now just focus on staying here
sometimes even a random stranger telling you to keep going hits different thank u fr
@Carobe23 hey if u ever need someone to talk to just hit me up