I don’t think he was my first love tbh

I don’t think he was my first love tbh. I don’t even think I’ve been in love. But back then I thought I loved him and it was the first time I felt that way. I believed all his lies. I think he set the bar for how I expected to be treated… in the worst way possible. I kinda wish I never met him because now it feels like no one will ever love me or see me the same way. Like they just wanna use me for my body. Every guy I talk to now I just assume they’re trying to use me so I put my walls up. I hate that I’m like this. It’s been 4 years but the way he treated me still sticks with me and I don’t know how to let go of it. I wish I could be like everyone else who finds someone who really likes them. I know people say your time will come but it doesn’t feel like it. I hope one day I’ll unlearn all the stuff he taught me and find someone who’ll make me grateful for everything I went through cause they’ll cherish me. If I’m honest I think I need to fix the heartbreak within myself. I let him make me feel like I wasn’t worthy but I am. I need to learn how to love myself again. He’s happy now, and I deserve to be happy too. I’m learning to love myself again. I deserve it.

Last updated on:2025-02-21T14:03:11+05:30