we broke up back in november last time i saw him was on his bday nov 20
he ended things super suddenly and like 2 days later he was already talking to some girl he clearly wanted to leave me for
i never got any real closure blocked him on everything since then i just wanted to forget the whole thing like it was a bad dream our relationship was mad toxic and i fully lost myself in it i’m honestly glad it ended but lowkey he did cheat by how he ended it later i found out he actually started dating that girl then in jan this random fake account hit me up on linkedin asking if i’d seen my ex lately cuz she was dating him i didn’t even wanna know but the confirmation that he moved on kinda weirdly set me free i blocked the account tho cuz idk who that was and i’ve been trying to heal and stay far away from any of his mess a few days after that he hits me up from a fake number double texting me at 4am lol
i woke up and instantly wanted to block him the rebound girl’s msg already had me feeling sick but him reaching out like that right when his lil rebound situationship ended just showed how selfish he is like he really had no respect for me texting me for attention like i was just some random girl i told him straight up i don’t ever wanna talk to you again leave me alone goodbye and i meant that it became super clear who he really was i opened up to him more than anyone
we were on and off and yeah i did mess up once by calling my other ex out of spite when he dumped me but i told him right after meanwhile he was lying a lot esp towards the end it was basically already done it’s been 4 months some days i feel fine other days like today i just feel numb i haven’t seen or hooked up with anyone since the breakup like yeah people have hit me up but no one’s been worth it i’m just taking my time i don’t feel emotionally ready for anything serious
and i def don’t wanna project my old baggage onto someone else it’s something i’ve struggled with before
and i know now what i had with him wasn’t love it was a bunch of hard lessons tbh i really feel like i’m meant to be single rn this is the first bday in 6 years that i’m single been a serial monogamist since i was 17 but at 24 i’m honestly cool with being alone trying to finally show up for myself instead of escaping into someone else’s world
i’m actually proud of myself for not letting what he did mess with my decisions but i won’t lie there’s still this old video of us i sometimes watch my home life is pretty toxic and this past week’s been hard sometimes i get hit with that nostalgia and longing he was my best friend once and at the same time i never wanna hear from him again
i just hope someday the memories fade i do resent him for wasting my time but i also hope we both heal from the ways we hurt each other i accept that the relationship was toxic and i’m honestly grateful it ended he def showed some narcissistic behavior near the end and even tho i don’t want to sometimes i still feel that pain like this dumb lil moment of missing my best friend even tho that version of him is long gone i worry i won’t feel that kind of connection again but maybe i shouldn’t i know i’m meant for better i’ve been unlearning a lot of old patterns i’m actually really thankful for the growth like finally being able to reflect on everything after years something i wouldn’t have done if i stayed with him it was never gonna work and deep down i believe it ended for a reason but yeah the sacrifice still hurts sometimes
Last updated on:2025-04-08T15:32:36+05:30
Comments (9)
You deserve a love that doesn’t make you question your worth. And now, you’re making space for the kind of love that truly honors you.
Sometimes the best attitude in Life is not that "I don't care" but it's " I don't mind" . So if your heart knows that you are not over the past pain then it means you are not and any reminder of your partner will bring that up in your mind. The easiest and hardest way to do this is just change yourself as person . Becone the person who can literally laught about what you have been through. and that is when you have really moved on.
hope this helps
The past may pull at you sometimes but the fact that you’re healing reflecting and moving forward proves how far you’ve come.
There’s still pain but there’s also growth. One day this chapter will just be a memory one that led you to something better.
Being single isn’t lonely when youre learning how to show up for yourself. Youre finally becoming the person you were always meant to be.
You weren’t crazy for loving him but he was careless with the love you gave. Now you get to give that love back to yourself.
You’re breaking old patterns stepping into your own power and unlearning toxic cycles. That alone is something to be proud of.
It hurts to miss someone who only brought chaos but deep down you know you’re meant for better and you’re already on that path.
It’s painful to realize someone wasn’t who you thought they were but in time you’ll see this wasn’t a loss—it was a lesson.