that one breakup totally messed me up It's been five years and I'm over it but it still like took something I can't get back I don't love the same way anymore not with the same hype or effort
When I first fell in love at nineteen I had all the feels planned cute dates put in so much effort without even thinking But now it's like that breakup drained me Left me so tired it's hard to explain
Now I'm in a super happy relationship I love my partner a lot he's the sweetest person ever He spoils me cherishes me loves me even when I don't think I deserve it He's healing a heart he didn't even break
But I feel bad cuz I can't love him how he loves me Not cuz I don't want to but cuz I'm too scared Too scared to love that hard to hope to have expectations That breakup showed me love can just end effort can be ignored even if you mean well it might not last So I built up walls
He doesn't even know I'm holding back He's happy with how things are and that makes me feel even worse Cuz he deserves so much more Someone who loves him without being scared or hesitating And I wish I could be that person I wish I wasn't so scared to let my guard down I wish I wasn't so over love
Last updated on:2025-04-21T13:41:08+05:30
Comments (5)
Same fr my last two relationships made me like this too..
First one was like no matter how much you talk if they don't wanna change they just won't
Second one showed me even the perfect person can be lying and hiding stuff and just full of it
Now I just don't even try or trust anymore like what's the point
Why did it end?
Thank you for sharing this because I have not yet tried to date out of fear of being hurt or fear that I'm not good enough cause it seemed I wasn't in my last relationship. but the fact your in a new relationship with someone who adores you amd is showing you lobe and your willingness to get back at there gives me so much hope that I can to. in my opinion yes sometimes the last relationship does something to us but I believe it does something For us! I'm learning to be transparent with my self and others. There's a song a part of it says Love like you never been hurt before. the statement puzzled me cause like how do you do that? but I find it that when we fully let go like on a roller coaster when u actually put your hands up and just go with the ride it's enjoyable but when I clinche and hold on cause I'm scared the ride is actually not that great. I'm proud of you for even jumping back in the game. shows me I can to. n I should stop being scared because what's truly meant will sustain anything. stay honest with you and it will flow out. Give your self some grace and don't beat ya self up. Thank you for sharing
Thanks...sending you good vibes..
Be gentle with yourself, May be he just wants you being around , May be thats his way of showing affection and your presence alone makes him so happy.Sometimes Love is not about How good you can do, or how you should be Loving someone but about How you can be present for them, How you can let them be how they are, How you can do your part as much you can. you have a partner that accepts your flaws.Be Ok with that and Enjoy your relation and forget the Past like it never happened