we are eight years together. Built a whole life kid and all. Huge backstory skipping that for now. Loved him hard he said forever kinda obsessed even. We fought a lot tho. He wanted out I didn't. Couldn't wrap my head around it felt so not him. Anyway we've been living together for almost two years since he dumped me. Finances are a MESS and our six-year-old autistic son means we gotta co-parent hardcore. Both work full-time therapies school literally no other support. These two years have been brutal. I thought it was just a phase we'd get back together. Finally realizing nah. Loved him cried every day. He moved to the garage. Every night I'd hope he'd be next to me. Nope. This breakup is extra hard 'cause no contact is impossible. See him every damn day. Like I said tons more to it. I make way less money. He basically said lease is up in August you're on your own. My job barely pays 30k. No family or friends to help. Honestly wanted to just disappear. Was thinking worst-case scenarios. Then I tried finding a place but this pending misdemeanor assault charge is screwing everything up – called for help guess who they took? Fighting it with a lawyer. Turns out a tiny scratch on his neck was their reason. Two days later I'm covered in bruises. Go figure. So now this charge is making my life hell. Can't find an apartment denied everywhere even though it's pending I'm not convicted and won't be it'll get dropped. FINALLY found this income-based place barely affordable but they pulled strings. My only shot. Signing papers moving tomorrow. And I'm just…so freaking sad. This feels like the real closure even though we'll see each other for our son. It's the end of us that I held onto for so long. Should be happy for new beginnings but I'm just not. I'm 40 starting over. Lonely miss who he used to be. Thought he'd come back. He's not. So yeah moving early even though he pays rent and reminds me daily it's his house. Why am I not happy? Why am I so scared to be alone? Haven't really been alone ever. Three long-term relationships back-to-back. This could be a fresh start. Packing right now just wanna cry. Never thought this day would come. Don't wanna leave him still clearly holding on but gotta take this chance. Guess I need some encouragement or stories from others who had totally intertwined lives and had to start over with little money and a kid. How did you even? I just can't see the light. ?
Last updated on:2025-05-07T14:55:45+05:30
Comments (7)
One day this pain will fade. One day you’ll look back and realize this was the moment you started truly living for yourself.
Change is scary but staying in something that no longer serves you is even scarier. You’re choosing yourself and that’s the bravest thing you can do.
You thought he’d come back and that hope made leaving harder. But the truth is you’re now free to create a life that doesn’t depend on someone else’s choices.
The fear of being alone is real but so is the possibility of discovering a strength you never knew you had. You are capable of rebuilding, even if you don’t see it yet.
You’re not just leaving behind a relationship you’re leaving behind years of pain and unfulfilled hope.
Starting over is terrifying but it’s also the beginning of something new.
sorry I'm bad at the whole cheering thing but fr hope it all works out for you it will just gotta chill for a bit.