I feel so up and down. yesterday marked one month leaving him and 18 days no contact. I can't sleep because I'm staying to remember all the little details of how badly he treated me. things from three years ago I had pushed down and forgot, they're all surfacing and they're kind of shocking to me now. it's hard remembering them. on his birthday just gone I asked him if he wanted to go for a drive somewhere to get out of the house, he proceeded to shout and scream at me calling me selfish that it was his birthday and he was tired from work and I've ruined it now. I ended up driving around the town we live in for an hour crying. I cane home and he ignored me for the entire night. how did I deserve that. that's just one of many bad memories that are flooding back. I do think at least the trauma bond is starting to be severed.
Last updated on:2025-05-27T18:37:55+05:30
Comments (8)
The storm of emotions right now is exhausting but you are moving through it. And every single day you choose yourself the grip he had on you weakens. One day you’ll wake up and realize you survived him.
I spent nights crying asking why he treated me like I was disposable. But now I know I wasn’t the problem. They were. And walking away was the greatest act of self love I could have given myself.
One month out and the trauma bond is cracking. That’s progress. That’s proof that healing is happening even when it feels unbearable right now.
That emotional whiplash feeling okay one day wrecked the next is part of the process. But every painful memory that resurfaces is another step toward freedom from him.
I know the weight of holding onto old pain. The more I remembered the more I wanted to believe I was overreacting. But I wasn’t. And neither are you. Your feelings are valid.
Thank you 😊
I used to ask myself How did I deserve this?" But the truth is I didn’t. And neither did you. People who love you don’t treat you like a burden. You are not selfish you were just hoping for the bare minimum.
the moment the bad memories started resurfacing. It felt like the heartbreak was happening all over again. But trust me those memories coming back means you're finally seeing the truth. That’s healing.