I used to think he was the one for me

I used to think he was the one for me. But he wasn’t, he didn’t understand my emotions, he didn’t know how to handle his own. He didn’t understand what my honesty meant, it meant love. when I told him something I knew was going to be hard to accept, I should’ve known I risked everything telling him that. Now it’s over, I had my last phone call with him last night, he was angry, I was in tears. Begging for forgiveness. (No I didn’t cheat if anyone is wondering.) I really wanted him to not give up on me, even through the hard times. I wanted him to choose me even if he was hurt, upset and confused. but his love was very conditional, mine wasn’t. I was tired of crying and begging. at some point I didn’t just let go, I threw it far. I made my mistakes, he has too. I always forgave him. He couldn’t forgive me. I don’t deserve that. It still hurts to think about or be reminded, it hurts to hear his family is telling him if he took me back the relationship would be a series of mistrust and regret. It hurts to know they told him other girls were out there for him. it hurts to know that he isn’t mine anymore. I think that’s the worst of it. The memories hurt. We were fine on a random Tuesday, then it all came crashing down. I turned to God in my pain. and I choose God now, the only one who never turned his back, who can forgive me, who loves every part of me, even the flawed. I hope my process of healing is accompanied by our heavenly Father, and I just have to remeber I was fine before my relationship with my ex, I will be fine after it too. God is Good.

Last updated on:2025-07-18T05:33:03+05:30