Sometimes, I wish I was the avoidant. But, I don’t wanna be someone incapable of processing their feelings to the point they shut ppl out and make others question their worth. Idk how avoidants swallow that guilt. And I wish, they jst fully let ppl in, esp those who try so hard. They may stay and say that they jst need space but clearly prioritizes others before reassuring you or what is so draining. I hate how they see mistakes as a gut punch and a proof that their unlovable rather than taking it as an opportunity to grow. I hate that when you open up, they’d voice out how guilty they are and you’d comfort them which shifts the focus onto them. I just hate how everything centers to them, their comfort, safety, and worth. That you’d have to adjust and adjust only to be pushed away. I just wish and wish they’d face wtv it is they’re feeling and grow rather than constantly running away from it. I hate how it was me who constantly gave and still be put to last…cuz I was there. I was willing to be there for him to help him heal, but he’d rather shut me out and distract himself with friends or wtv
Last updated on:2025-07-27T17:56:56+05:30
Comments (7)
i was the one who stayed who made space who waited. he said i need time but had so much energy for everyone else. it’s the slow burn of realizing you were never the priority.
This. Bcs why refuse to give energy on someone who always loved and cared for you? it rlly sucks the life outta you when u feel like u’re jst a second option in the rs
ugh i feel this in my bones. being the one who shows up again and again only to be met with walls... it’s exhausting.
this hit way too close. i remember crying after comforting my avoidant ex when i told him how much he was hurting me. like how did i end up being the villain for just needing love?
look..you’re not crazy for wanting to be chosen. you’re not too much for wanting reciprocity. and you’re definitely not alone in this. 💔
i get the anger, i really do. and also… sometimes i wonder if avoidants aren’t heartless, just so deep in shame they can’t even look up. not saying it excuses anything. it doesn’t. but it helped me stop waiting for someone who wasn’t ready to look at themselves.
this hurt to read. cuz same. i gave and gave. waited through silence. made room for his pain. but every time i needed even a little bit back, he’d vanish or spiral and suddenly i'm comforting him. it’s like their guilt becomes another way to center themselves. i used to think if i just loved harder, he’d stop running. but he didn’t. and it broke me.