Day 34.Everything was going alright till 1 AM hit, all of the emotions, all of the grief and the good memories hit me all at once. I just can not unforget our last conversation where it was supposed to be closure and seek comfort or solutions to fix up, but all I got was "you want to fix things,only because you are attached to me emotionally", which was completely untrue and got me unfriended and unfollowed fro. everywhere like 3 years meant nothing to her. I even invited her to my Erasmus rent, so she can stay with me, but she prefered to leave me instead of fixing things..it was easier for her, but i bet she knew she would hurt me badly... That day I got a stab in my heart, which continues to bleed to this day and I don't know how to stop it.
Last updated on:2025-08-14T06:04:00+05:30
Comments (8)
she decided it was easier to shut it all off than face what was broken between you
Yeah, and the worst part..it was so easy to fix, it required time..
reading this feels so familiar. i used to replay the last words in my head too. it made nights so much worse
Yeah, sometimes it doesn't get any easier
i read everything you wrote, all the emotions and the hurt. it sounds like you're feeling so much pain right now, like a part of you is still bleeding from what happened. it's completely understandable to feel that way, especially when a relationship that meant so much ends in a way that feels so unfair and confusing. i'm really sorry you had to go through that. when someone you love says things like "you want to fix things, only because you are attached to me emotionally," it can feel like a stab in the heart, and that feeling doesn't just go away. it's natural to still be replaying those memories and feeling the raw pain of it all. i hear you when you say you don't know how to stop it, and i want to tell you that the most important thing right now is to just let yourself feel it. don't try to rush the healing process, because that's not how it works. you don't have to fix everything today. the most compassionate thing you can do for yourself is to give yourself the time and space to heal. that means allowing yourself to be sad, to be angry, to feel all those emotions without judgment. it also means that while you feel this, you still have to keep going with your life. you can cry, but you can also make your coffee. you can feel heartbroken, but you can still go for a walk. it's about holding both things at once, the pain and the persistence. this is a deep wound, and it will take time to close. you are not to blame for feeling what you feel, and you deserve to be kind to yourself. a breakup is a loss, and you are grieving. give yourself the permission to grieve. you don't have to carry this alone. we can all face this, and you also can. all of this will end soon, trust me. good luck!
I hope it will go away, but it's so hard when you are away by yourself in another country. Sometimes I just wish it is all a really bad dream.
i remember when mine said something like that. like my feelings were some weakness. i felt stupid for even wanting to talk
Yeah, it made me just shut my feelings up, then she d complain that I don't speak about them.