first day..i am trying so hard not to text him

i know that first day silence. my phone felt like it weighed a ton, like it controlled me. it eased a little when i realized every hour i didn’t text was proof i could actually survive without him.

i remember that exact thing, words saying one thing and everything else showing the opposite. i felt like i was losing my mind trying to match them up. i hated how it made me beg for scraps.

your first day or first time feeling this way