It's been almost 3 weeks since I the break up and it's day 3 of no contact. I keep doing my 20min morning meditation and my skin care. After weeks of feeling numb, I am beginning to feel a bit more like myself again. I know I have many things to look forward to.
And finally I feel like the weight on my shoulders is becoming less and less. I didn't want the break up, but I am starting to believe that he actually did me a favor by leaving me.
Looking back at our relationship, I still feel the pain from all the times he didn't introduce me as his "girlfriend". All the times he got upset and angry when I said "No". All the times he just kept asking for more and more, but still never was satisfied. All the times he would "punish" me with silent treatment. And how he could break up with me just a few days after I made him the sweetest birthday surprise.
I am starting to see now how selfish and ungrateful he was. But also how much he's been lying to himself, claiming that he is the perfect partner.
#avoidtheavoidant
Last updated on:2025-09-04T15:02:52+05:30
Comments (4)
i used to tell myself i was the problem for saying no. looking back, i can see how unfair it was. it’s good you’re feeling a little lighter now. i didn’t feel that until weeks later.
I am so sorry to hear this and that it took you so long to realize that you were never the problem. It really is unfair.
It makes me angry to see now how he just asked for more and more, while he didn't even offer the bare minimum. But I already called him out during the relationship. All he ever did was shifting the blame on me, changing the narrative or giving me the silent treatment. It's such a great feeling when the clarity comes ❤️ I hope you are feeling much better now! Saying "no" is never the problem. People not accepting that are the true problem.
reading this pissed me off cause i remembered mine doing the silent treatment too. felt like i was begging just to exist next to him. i planned birthdays, made shit special, and he acted like it was nothing.
I know how you feel. I got the silent treatment on a regular basis. He made a disrespectful joke and I told him that I found this very hurtful. His response? Silent treatment for 3 days without any apology.
Or another time when we planned to meet up, but I got a little bit sick and cancelled. Instead of caring or understanding, he said he will pull away for the rest of the week, but then called me the next morning...
It's really unfair and traumatizing. I am glad that I no longer have to cry because of his behavior. Now I can just mourn the beginning of the relationship when he treated me nicely and move on. I wish you a lot of strength, too!