day 1 was depression, day 2 was depression, day 3 was a weird mix of denial and depression, day 4 added acceptance to the mix and today I somehow feel all of it?
I'm angry, looking back, I put so much work into the end of the relationship, constantly resolving arguments and trying to work out how to make us both feel better while she J's accepted it, never attempting to fix things unless I was leading her there
I'm in denial as well. I don't believe it's truly over. we still love each other. it's just a temporary breakup. idk if that's fully true but I do think we will end up together
somehow I'm simultaneously accepting that things didn't work anymore. we both got horrible mentally, and maybe if we get better and can work things out we will, but that's not what I need to focus on right now
I'm still depressed over it. 8 months in teenage lesbian feels like 8 years. she was my soulmate, at least that's what I thought. I still can't eat.
I do keep thinking "maybe I'll call her and we can fix things" I feel I could make things right again. I just don't think that's what's really best for us anymore. I think it would do worse for our relationship if I tried to get back with her.
I think we have a chance so long as we get the space we need to get better. but maybe I'm delusional.
Last updated on:2025-09-11T17:45:04+05:30
Comments (3)
reading this feels like how i was when i kept saying “we still love each other” while also admitting it broke me. it’s the way someone can grieve, hope, and accept in the same breath.
the mix of feelings makes sense. i used to think if i just held on tighter we’d be fine, but i was also starving and sick from the stress. it wasn’t simple, it was love and pain at the same time.
begging myself to eat. ithought i found my forever. she let me carry everything and still acted like i was too much. the grief felt like whiplash, i never knew which version of me i’d wake up as.