It's a heavy word, isn't it? The kind whose gravity lingers on for much, much longer than it is spoken. The hollow feeling you feel when you see a silly cat, a beautiful sunset or a lovely mountain view, but realise you don't have anyone to share it with - not anymore. The fact that your cornerstone, your trusted foundation, your limitless source of confidence against your world does not exist- and it's all your fault. It was something you wanted at some instance in a fit of rage, and now you cannot unsay the words you've said. The damage your rotten self wanted to inflict has been inflicted, and poof- they're gone. They'd drop behind a trail of stuff on their way out, and it smells like them. Their clothes somehow bring you more warmth than yours ever did. Their presence made you feel like you always fit in- snapped in place, like a jigsaw piece.
Last updated on:2025-09-16T20:52:03+05:30
Comments (3)
are you hoping to fix things with them or are you trying to figure out how to live with the loss of who you were with them?
ugh, not preachy but this helped me — write the words you said down, then write what you actually meant. don’t send it unless you truly want to, but getting it out made the guilt quieter for me. small, steady things help when everything feels huge. you didn’t ruin your whole self in one moment, even if it feels like it.
this hurt to read i feel this in my bones. i did the same thing once said things in a fit of anger and watched the person i loved walk away. his hoodie smelled like him for weeks and i kept replaying the moment over and over wishing i could yank the words back. the shame felt like lead like i’d carved a gap in myself. i’m sorry you’re carrying this.