I dont know how to feel

Author

My now ex boyfriend broke up with me on Tuesday this week. we were having lots of communication problems in our long distance-relationship. I was supposed to move in with him in a month. It was an awful break-up and I spent the last few days crying.
Yesterday, he called me and told me I could move in with him as a trial if I changed certain behaviors (respecting his space, leaving him alone after fights), he would try to change as well.

I told him that I cant just forget about the break-up. if he was living near me, I might have said yes, but hes living abroad. its too much for me right now. I need him to be sure about the relationship to move to a foreign country for him. i know hes not sure.

Now I feel as if I had ended the relationship even though I did not. I'm starting to fantasize about writing to him and trying to make it work, but I know right now that's a bad idea

Last updated on:2025-09-25T01:24:52+05:30

Comments (7)

Jalpie
Jalpie 5 mths ago

have you thought about what you really want long-term, not just what might work if he changes? sometimes that helps quiet the what-ifs

EasyDays479
EasyDays479 5 mths ago

thanks for your advice. I decided that no contact and taking space is the right thing to do for me right now so I can figure out what I really want... I think I lost it out of sight

Jimanni
Jimanni 5 mths ago

it’s okay to feel torn, especially with moving abroad involved. giving yourself space and clarity before reaching out is honestly the healthiest move right now

Lunabibo
Lunabibo 5 mths ago

ugh yes i’ve been there 😭 i broke up with my long-distance ex and kept fantasizing about fixing things… but i had to step back or i’d have lost myself completely

EasyDays479
EasyDays479 5 mths ago

I'll try to step back too.. :( it feels horrible right now but I know I'd loose myself too if I kept trying..was the break-uo with your ex long ago and do you feel better now?

letitgo_user
letitgo_user 5 mths ago

You two need to talk more maybe there's a solution.

EasyDays479
EasyDays479 5 mths ago

thanks for your opinion, maybe you're right.. maybe we should calm down, take a break and try to find a solution. I know we both love each other, the distance has just been so hard and he hates phone calls, video calls, texting, which doesn't make it easier