how do I trust myself to make better standards?

Author

I’m not sure why, but I went from missing her, sobbing every night and checking our messages to just thinking back at how little she gave me. like, I loved her so much - I wanted to marry her! but I realise that she actually SUCKED??

like, for example she never did anything with me - she never put in effort to come and see me, I always had to come to her and when I came to see her, she never wanted to do anything - even when I was paying for it. and no, I wasn’t like - suggesting things she didn’t like or anything - I actively noted what she liked and things she said she wanted to do but when I suggested that we go, she didn’t want to go.

the only things she was always happy to do was go and get food ( when I was paying or my mum said we could get dinner on her) or sex.
she told me she never loved me when she broke up with me but she sobbed and screamed at me to get out when I didn’t get the non-verbal hints that she wanted to have sex?

how can I trust myself to love someone else if I truly believed that this person loved me? I’m so scared to go back into dating because what if I find someone worse who hurts me worse?

if you had a bad ex, how did you move on with higher standards?? and know how you deserve to be treated??

Last updated on:2025-09-30T23:58:02+05:30

Comments (5)

dieheart
dieheart 5 mths ago

have you tried reflecting on what actually made you feel loved versus what you were expecting? sometimes seeing it clearly helps set boundaries for next time

lowbig
lowbig 5 mths ago

it helps me to write down what i NEED in a relationship and what i won’t accept. slowly i started trusting my instincts again before dating anyone new

QuickyME
QuickyME 5 mths ago

was with someone who only ever showed up when it was convenient for them 😭 it took me months to see that and realize i deserved bette

MooHop802
MooHop802 5 mths ago

this is so real.

DreamAndChill434

oh you deserve way more th😭😭 Just realise your worth. Make sure you NEVER settle for any less than what you think you deserve. Don't fall inlove for potential on what they could be or do for you.