I downloaded this so I could get used to living without him. We were not really in no contact, we just broke up to never come back together. I realized that today is day 50 after we broke up and went definiely in no contact. He called me today and ask for some conversation. He felt alone and wanted someone to speak with. I agree to have this conversation. It moved many things inside me. He told me about the girl he started seeing after me, how she was interested only in money and he broke contact with her. he also offered to help me with my moving in January, to compensate me for all the favors I did for him before. It lead me to realize how he knows. he knows how he used me. He now knows I have him blocked and restricted in all app, I even erased his number from my contacts. I told him how I doubt his integrity as a man. How I believe he is a bad person, and how I dont feel any hate but he is not my cup of tea, even as a friend. He hung up the phone when he couldnt bear how I said a few times during the call how I thought he was a shitty person. I feel conflicted but I feel proud because I didnt stutter, I didnt fight but I didnt concede. I feel sorry for him, I feel he us pathetic, what was he expecting out of calling me? to give him thumbs up and tell him how he was not a bad person, that I believe in him and how he can do it. Thats not something I can do anymore. I decided to leave my country next year and let this behind me.
Last updated on:2025-11-03T22:08:02+05:30
Comments (6)
you handled that call beautifully. you didn’t stoop, didn’t soothe, didn’t rage that’s growth. it’s normal to feel conflicted after moments like that. pride and grief can exist together.
my ex did the same reached out months later, like i was supposed to comfort him about his new failures. it’s such a weird mix of pity and pride, right? like… “you don’t get to use me as your mirror anymore
I am so proud of you. You were so strong for that and I hope you are proud of yourself because you regained a lot of power by putting yourself first.
I hope you stick to this traction.
The long no contact helped you stay grounded,
because if he had called you earlier like (after 14 days from when the no contact had started) you would have swayed a little bit and conceded.
I'm proud of you stranger🥰
it'll get to a point you would be surprised you even put him on a pedestal
you won't even think he was a shitty person just a stranger you gave so much access to
and that's where the real peace begins, you'll start wishing him well and wishing him peace
I can't wait till I get to this level 😫
Well, I'm a naïve person. I never wished him bad and only ask life to get him totally out of my life. I wish him well and opportunities to heal, he always said he was a bad person and I was always there trying to convince him that he was not. Now, there's just this realization that he, in fact, is a bad person, or specially bad to me. I think it shattered something in him. He sent me a message at 3AM saying "You didnt have to repeat to me how bad I am, but, thanks" He's always loved to victimized himself and I decided to not answer anymore. I've said my piece and I stand by it.
BTW, you r totally right. im also grateful he waited this long to reach out, now I can be calm about it. But we saw each other on day 14, to give back some items and it unsettled me. A lot. That day I realized he was already seeing that girl that he mentioned and it boosted my resolution to not reach out anymore