How do you stop thinking about someone every single day? We were never officially together and it ended without any closure he just ghosted me. I know he treated me terribly disappearing like I never mattered. And yet months later I’m still hurting. I’ve spent more time grieving than I ever spent knowing him and that makes me feel foolish. I haven’t even told my friends I’m still not over it it’s too embarrassing.
I’ve tried everything journaling crying writing a goodbye letter talking to friends in the early days. I removed him from social media deleted our pictures and chats. I thought I was healing but lately he’s been on my mind constantly. The connection felt so intense the intimacy so real. I think I fell so hard because he was the first person I liked after a long painful breakup and it’s rare for me to feel that way about someone.
Things got worse two months ago when I slept with someone new. I liked him but when I got home I cried because it wasn’t him. I’ve tried meeting other people but every time someone kisses me I find myself comparing it to him. It never feels the same. It’s like emotional torture.
I keep myself busy with university work and friends. I try to fill my days with activity but I can’t be out and distracted 24/7. When I’m alone the emotions flood in. Nights are the hardest right before sleep everything hits me.
It doesn’t help that I’m in my 30s. I always thought I’d be married by now but instead I’m still dealing with heartbreak. Serious relationships feel impossible to find. People tell me I’m beautiful kind and deserving but if that’s true why is love so hard for me? Every time I catch feelings I end up in tears. Why does it seem like everyone else finds their person and I’m always left behind? Whether I play it cool or wear my heart on my sleeve it always ends the same.
I know how to be alone I’ve done it for years. But I don’t want to be alone forever. Friendships aren’t the same. These thoughts and the lingering pain from him make me feel helpless. It’s like I’m living in emotional hell and I don’t know how much longer I can keep going like this. I wish I could afford therapy but I can’t. So I’m just trying to survive.
Last updated on:2025-11-04T18:22:02+05:30
Comments (3)
this might sound small, but when you think of him, is it the real him you miss or the person you hoped he’d become if he hadn’t ghosted you? sometimes that question changes everything.
i went through something almost identical. he wasn’t even my boyfriend, but the connection felt real. when he ghosted me, it broke something in me that an official breakup never did. i spent months crying over a person i barely knew because it wasn’t just about him… it was about everything i wanted that never got the chance to exist. you’re not foolish for feeling this much. you just cared
The thinking will pass eventually , don't let it distract you too much , that's that you are 30 years old and you're not married it's definetly ok