After he coldly ended things with me out of the blue (he was very persistent on wanting a relationship and pushed on doing long distance, told me I was his soulmate etc.) but then he changed his mind on cutting me out after I devastatingly begged him to communicate and not cut things off like this — so we agreed on distance for a week but he did tell me he might want to message me words of encouragement during the week because he knew he hurt me.
However, it was complete silence, no letter or long text showing true remorse for what he did, and I decided it’s best to accept that it was over despite him thinking we’d talked things over and that ‘he just needed some distance’. I am also so heartbroken and can’t fathom going back knowing he can cut me out like that with no explanation.
However, he sent me a sweet message today wishing me good luck on a presentation I had today, followed up with “you’re so impressive I know you’re killing it right now” but he sent this too late as my day was already over when he sent me this in his time zone, which he said he was ‘sorry’ for — I also noticed he followed a girl he used to talk to on Spotify (also doesnt even live in his country), idk if that’s recent but it’s within a month or two — another knife in the heart.
So I know it’s clear this guy doesn’t deserve me after everything he put me through, but my question is why? Why do these so called ‘misunderstood’, ‘empathetic and romantic’ guys who swear they would never hurt us do this? Why can’t he just leave me alone? Why did he message me now and why did he drag me into this in the first place? (I explain my story in a previous post🥺)
I want to heal so badly but I can’t deal with the hurt of this, I think it’s one of the most painful things i’ve gone through feeling betrayed like this, I feel sick. I usually always see through people, I gave him a chance, and when I loved him back unconditionally he completely punished me for it. I feel ashamed for wanting to respond to his message. Or maybe he’s messaging me only out of guilt?
Last updated on:2025-11-08T13:58:23+05:30
Comments (5)
do you think you’d feel better if you replied and got it off your chest, or would it just open the wound again?
I did end up responding and telling him how I felt. But now he’s acting as if I’m hurting him.
it’s okay that part of you still wants to answer him. that’s the attachment talking, not weakness. when my ex did this, i had to remind myself that breadcrumbs aren’t closure. silence can be kinder than the half-effort messages.
i went through something like this too he called me his “forever person,” pushed for commitment, then ghosted like it meant nothing. that whiplash between “you’re my soulmate” and “i need space” messes with your sense of reality. i remember feeling sick every time he reached out after breaking me. like, why do they show up just enough to keep us hurting? you’re not alone in this heartbreak
Thank you for your comment 🥺was he willing to try again when he reached out to you or was it more so for him to ‘see how you’re doing’?