It’s only been about two weeks and I’m sleeping on a cot in a spare room trying to make it through what’s supposed to be a two-month transition before I move out. Tonight is the first time she stayed overnight with the guy she left me for and I can’t stop crying. She was my reason for living and now that she’s gone I honestly don’t know how to keep going. Over the past year I’ve lost everything I cared about and I feel completely lost.
I miss her so much it’s like half of me is missing. I feel empty and broken. The fact that she already had someone else makes me feel like I never mattered to her. Were all the I love yous and promises of forever just empty words? I know this probably sounds messy without context but I needed to say it out loud to someone. The only friends I had were through her and now I feel completely alone.
Every day is a struggle. I stare at my phone hoping for a message that will never come. I can’t eat I can’t sleep I just cry until I’m too exhausted to stay awake. I’m falling apart at work unable to focus. I isolate myself because even seeing her face feels unbearable. I keep telling myself she’d be sad if I gave up but deep down I’m terrified she wouldn’t care at all.
I always said I just wanted her to be happy but why couldn’t she be happy with me? I’m so tired of hurting tired of pretending time will fix this. I don’t want more time. I just want the pain to stop. I’m exhausted emotionally drained and I don’t know how to keep going. I just needed someone to hear me.
Last updated on:2025-11-12T03:57:34+05:30
Comments (4)
I completely understand you. when my ex left me, I had to sleep in the guest bedroom for days because the room we shared reminded me too much of him. I was bedridden and I had little-to-no appetite. at work I was like a zombie, forcing myself to move and pushing back tears. it felt like my entire world had walked out the door and I had no idea what to do with myself.
what you're going through is grief and it's okay. it's okay to feel the way you're feeling unapologetically. what you're feeling is the first step to moving through it, just letting yourself be sad, be any emotion you're feeling. you're doing the best you can with what you have and that's all that matters. even if it's hard, just try your best to give yourself grace and compassion.
do you think staying in the same space is making it harder to breathe through this?
this is the hardest part the in-between. you’re grieving and still surrounded by reminders of her. what helped me a little was treating the pain like weather. it came, it stormed, but it didn’t stay forever. you don’t have to be okay right now. just survive this part.
when my ex left for someone else, i was living in the same apartment for a bit too. hearing her laugh in the next room one night… i broke. i thought i’d never make it out of that darkness. but i did. it took a long time, and i still miss the version of me that loved that deeply. you’re not alone in this, even if it feels like it.