Im tempted to send him birthday wishes

Author

although im on day 60of NC and I know this is a super stupid idea. ive been doing well until last week. I think I associate autumn with him and it is a trigger for me. also It's Kindness Day today where i live (the same day as his bday) and im not sure why but im very close to sending him a message. he left me two months ago, he tried to be in a relationship with me but after almost a year he gave up. despite some happy moments he's emotioanlly unavailable person with some traumas he doesnt want to work on. I know i probably shouldnt do it but I cant stop thinking about him today. Help.

Last updated on:2025-11-15T02:58:31+05:30

Comments (11)

Crushed
Crushed 4 mths ago

what do you think you’d be hoping for if you did message him today? like what response are you craving from him right now?

ChillPals137
ChillPals137 4 mths ago

Just wish him a happy birthday... Make him also to be confused from his side... stir things up...

RominiaPablo
RominiaPablo 4 mths ago

when i get the urge to reach out, i usually sit with it for a few minutes and ask myself what i actually want back from him. it’s rarely him. it’s usually the comfort or the familiarity. that pause is what saves me.

unknownPP
unknownPP 4 mths ago

i hit my own “season trigger” a few months after my breakup and it knocked me out after i thought i was finally okay. mine was winter, every cold morning felt like him. it’s not stupid, it’s your body remembering him even when your mind knows better. day 60 is HUGE btw. even if today feels messy.

ZappyWave665
ZappyWave665 4 mths ago

thank you 🙏🙏🙏 i appreciate. it's the next day and it feels better already.

Lilith
Lilith 4 mths ago

do not do it trust nothing good will come out of it 2 months is not enough for him to change for u. u will just reopen the wounds u managed to close pleas wait more with your no contact if u must reach out and maybe u might not even want to by then

ZappyWave665
ZappyWave665 4 mths ago

thank you! I dont want him anymore and I know he isnt for me these are just the moments that i cant stop thinking "what if?" I waited and asked my friends for intervention. it helped.

Lilith
Lilith 4 mths ago

@ZappyWave665 u are amazing good job.mine reached out after the second ghosting and im dong everything I can not to respond I know how hard
it is but ppl like u motivate me as well. we don’t need them if they couldn’t appreciate what they hard then they will never have us again

ZappyWave665
ZappyWave665 4 mths ago

@Lilith this is strength you're describing. ill tell you what my friend told me yesterday: to be aware of all this, to say "no" to them and know the hard moment is coming and to ask for intervention and help just before it hits - it's strength. ppl like u motivate me too. thanks! ❤️

Mekdi
Mekdi 4 mths ago

if he hurted you, you deserve better

ZappyWave665
ZappyWave665 4 mths ago

Also I blocked him and cut the contact. He wanted to be friends. I couldnt. he hurt me but im wondering if this is not part of the healing process. I dont know what to do. go to bed and Wake up tomorrow;)