me and my guy were highschool sweet heart who rekindle after 8years. we were together for 5 years. recently he told me he wanted to be single. I begged him not to do this I promise change and better version of me and at first he said ok. then the next day he told me he met a friend and didn’t want to let it go because it was refreshing. anew start no drama no kids no nothing. in the begin everything was great we were so happy to rekindle. but after year 3 I got so comfortable and started to slack off in showing him the love he and his kids needed. (we both have kids of our own)he asked me to do more be more but I brushed him off. towards the end I realized I need to do more and I tried but I guess I was too late. then the conversation hit that he wanted to be done. I know I cause the strain in our relationship. I was selfish stuck in my own ways. he asked me to do counseling I said no the first time because I lost my job and didn’t have the funds for it. thought he was over reacting too smh. I feel like it’s my fault. I shoukdve done better and now I lost my person my world. but he always told me he love the ground I walk on. he would randomly say “if I was to marry you right now, would u?” & I always said yes even if we were arguing. he was my world. I begged him to not do this I begged him to take baby steps at least but he told me there was a friend someone else who made him feel better. I take accountability but I feel so guilty that we didn’t work now in heart broken lost my future the love of my life my bestfriend. and I have no one to talk to this about other the chat gpt. I need a friend. o just want him to come back to prove im better and can be better
Last updated on:2025-11-17T22:24:40+05:30
Comments (5)
can i ask… when you think about getting him back, is it about him specifically or is it more about wanting to undo the guilt and the “what ifs”?
I think it’s alittle of both. he was my bestfriend & I qlways told him if we don’t work out I want us to continue our friendship because we have such a strong bond… I do want to undo the guilt. I wanted to show him I can be that person he wanted me to be. I was just being selfish and stubborn it this lost showed me I can’t always be like that so it’s like I want to prove to him I am that women. but now it’s been a couple days and I’m actually afraid. I say I want him back, I wish he pop up but if he did I don’t know if I’m ready to face him or get back into the grove.
when i was stuck in that mix of guilt and wanting to prove myself, what helped me a little was slowing down and letting the panic settle. you’re allowed to want him back, but you don’t have to punish yourself every second for what you didn’t know then. try to give yourself some softness while the heartbreak is loud.
i went through something kind of similar where i realized too late that i stopped showing up the way my person needed, and by the time i tried, he had someone “refreshing” in his ear. that guilt is a monster. it makes you feel like you threw away your whole future with your own hands. i’m really sorry you’re carrying all of that alone right now
go easy on urself