i recently was broken up with by my boyfriend because of our long distance which his parents didn’t accep . you can probably understand from the first sentence that i’m young and this is my first ever proper relationship . we dated for a year and a bit and it was the happiest i’ve ever been , he got me out of a dark time and helped me so much . now that he’s gone i feel lost . he still loves me and i still love him . and that hurts knowing we can’t be together because of something we can’t control . in my heart i believe he is perfect for me. he matched me and was exactly my type . i miss him so much it hurts. what do i do? i don’t want to feel like this anymore.
Last updated on:2025-11-20T02:33:05+05:30
Comments (8)
I understand the pain. Even though we met in person randomly... she had to fly back as it was a business trip several days later... The connection was absolute fire and I finally felt I met someone I could share my life with. The countless hours and many months in our distance we both did not feel like physical distance.
As long as he wants and is able to meet you where you are in your relationship..thats important all the time.
I had to tell my parents I was going to date her anyway long distance...my mother was so upset. I ended up telling her i broke it off but i did not. I am close with my mother but since i live in different state than her it was a bit easy to not talk about it. But it killed me to do that as I love her and talked to her about my dating life when I wanted to. I eventually confessed months later and she said she just knew.. And my mother had to accept it.
But...what I learned was for me, the woman I was falling for kept me out of everyone she talked to, except a friend early on. She displayed all the tiny gifts in her office I sent and letters she kept...She was reciprocal and well engaged for 4 months, romantic virtual dates but still wanted a no label connection. I look back and I think I turned into a placeholder for someone better financially..she did not want any commitment to me. I pushed to reconnect in person... we finally had a pair of dates and I immediately booked a flight to see her (which I was to be there Today :( She backed out a week ago with no reason but saying too much pressure No idea when or if it will happen in the future besides her then telling me how much she misses me and wished I was her boyfriend while being great entertainment. Yes...I gave her grace because she was recently divorced and had two young kids. I was patient. My feelings grew so much but the ambiguity is what killed it for me. That hurt so bad. When she discarded how I felt I could not bear it anymore. I broke it off.
All this to say, If he was all in with you and you think the physical distance can realistically be mended with travel and a plan for the future to be physically together one day AND he follows through on this early on....you never know.
But My advice is to heal yourself. Your family wants to protect you from even worst pain they potentially see long term if it continues and well I found that out the hard way.
Anyway hope that helps.
do you two still talk a lot or is there some distance now?
we haven’t talked in 2 days , since we both love eacother still it’s better if we just go no contact
when i felt like that, the only thing that helped a tiny bit was giving myself something to hold onto that wasn’t him. like even one small thing every day that was mine. it didn’t make the pain disappear, but it stopped it from swallowing me whole.
my first real relationship ended because his family didn’t like the distance either and it wrecked me because it wasn’t even about us. it’s that awful kind of heartbreak where you still love each other but the world around you just… doesn’t line up. i remember missing him so much i felt physically sick. you’re not dramatic for hurting like this. it’s a real loss
does it get better?
I believe long distance can work if both of you are willing to make it work... you just need constant communication, maybe video calls..
I believe it can work
@usermkj28 if I were you, I would not break up with him because of his parents or distance... I would stay with him to be honest..