It’s been three months since she broke up with me.
The raw emptiness, the sick feeling in my stomach, all that heavy stuff… that went after about two weeks once I started journaling and working out. But she was still on my mind a lot back then.
Now she’s still in my head sometimes. I get nostalgic now and then, and aye, I miss her sometimes… but I know I’d never go back. I wasn’t loved the way I needed to be loved, and she couldn’t take love the way I gave it. She’s a lovely person and I’m grateful for the good memories, and I’ve learned from the bad ones.
I’ve met someone new recently — a friend of a friend — and I’ve got a proper crush. I don’t compare her to my ex at all, she’s her own person and she’s class. But I’m taking my time. I want to actually enjoy being on my own for once. Living by myself is hard financially, especially going from two wages to one when she moved back home. And honestly, I’ve been in a bit of a low place lately.
I put so much effort into healing from the breakup that I realised something bigger: even when I was with her, I wasn’t fully happy with myself. So now I’m trying to become the best version of me.
I’ve lost 2 stone. I’m running three times a week, going to the gym 2–3 times, playing golf again, reading more, and I had my first counselling session last week. I’m even looking at signing up for drama lessons just to push myself a bit.
It’s not easy, but I’m getting there.
Last updated on:2025-11-21T14:15:51+05:30
Comments (6)
I am happy u met someone new
this is exactly how I felt in relationship
when you say you weren’t fully happy with yourself even while you were with her… do you know what part of you felt the emptiest back then?
It was mostly the day to day stuff where I realised I wasn’t happy. I expected my relationship to be the main thing that made me feel good and when you do that you slowly stop doing the things that actually keep you right. I gave up a lot of my hobbies and the things I enjoyed and I kinda lost myself. I didn’t really have much of an identity outside the relationship so when things were good I felt good and when things were bad I just felt empty. I’ve realised now that no one else is meant to make you happy, you’ve gotta build that yourself, so I’m getting back into the things I love and focusing on becoming someone I actually enjoy being again.
it sounds like you’re building a proper life for yourself, not just a distraction. don’t rush the crush thing. let it be slow. the more you settle into your own company, the easier everything else feels.
when my last relationship ended i did the whole “fix myself like it’s a project” thing too. the workouts, the journals, the big life changes. it helped but it also showed me how unhappy i’d been for ages. reading your bit about still thinking of her sometimes… yeah, that part stays for a while. doesn’t mean you want them back. it’s just your heart catching up to your brain. proud of you for doing the hard stuff.