going crazy

Author

I find my randomly having conversations in my head. will you pick up the phone if and when he calls. Do you think he will call .Do you think he misses you. will I be okay without him. should I make an excuse to contact him. it's a constant battle with myself.
I just want it to stop my brain is telling me he never really loved me his enjoying his life without me his probably flirting openly without no guilt with his colleague now. his family probably happy I'm gone
I wasted 5 years and all I can think is il probably never get married I lost my chance to have children it's too late now 😔 💔

Last updated on:2025-11-21T18:51:44+05:30

Comments (14)

Passiptha
Passiptha 3 mths ago

when your brain goes into that loop about him living his best life, is that coming from something he used to do or say
 or is it more the fear talking?

ladyT
ladyT 3 mths ago

it's what I've experienced with him before we broke up 1s in the holiday season and his posts were always him with his family and friends having a good time while I couldn't even leave my room or celebrate

Blindfaith
Blindfaith 3 mths ago

i had a 6 year thing crash and burn and my brain did the SAME spiral. those fake conversations in my head, the “will he ever call,” the “did i ruin my whole life,” all of it. it was like my mind kept dragging me back to a person who walked away. it took me a while to realize that none of those spirals were actually about him. they were about the shock. the abandonment. the fear of starting over when you’re tired as hell. you’re not crazy. you’re not dramatic. you’re grieving a future you thought was yours

ladyT
ladyT 3 mths ago

how did you overcome it ? I feel like I just want to shut down I don't want to think anymore I don't know how much of this I can take.

ChillPals137
ChillPals137 3 mths ago

I have been there before... few days later, he called... I took it as instincts

ladyT
ladyT 3 mths ago

so you telling me not to pick up that phone call?

ChillPals137
ChillPals137 3 mths ago

@ladyT I picked.. and we talked.. and we got back together... and we broke up again

ladyT
ladyT 3 mths ago

@ChillPals137 I've went through that circle but I guess this time it's different because something big just happened (his sister baby was born last night)and he didn't call me which is more heart breaking 💔 he use to call me even if we weren't together to share big news

ChillPals137
ChillPals137 3 mths ago

@ladyT the silence speaks a lot

HappyBae175
HappyBae175 3 mths ago

i am struggling with this to. but please remember, if he wanted to he would! his silence is saying a lot and please listen!

ladyT
ladyT 3 mths ago

I think that's even harder to accept the fact that his not like did he forget about me so quickly did he move on already

HappyBae175
HappyBae175 3 mths ago

@ladyT yes i know what you feel, in my situation i know he cares, but i heard that hĂ© didnt even told his friends, so he doesn’t talk about it, probably doenst think about it as much. he will hide his feelings. but there will be a day where he struggles and will feel it to. but i hope that we moved on by that time! Right now, the most loving thing you can do is protect your peace and focus on the truth of his actions, not the memories of the good moments. You deserve someone who chooses you clearly, consistently, and proudly.....not someone who keeps you waiting in pain.

ladyT
ladyT 3 mths ago

@HappyBae175 I know what you saying is right I just need my heart to believe it.
Do you still have contact with your ex

HappyBae175
HappyBae175 3 mths ago

@ladyT no i removed him from social media, everyday i struggle not to text him. but it is his time to show me that he cares.