hellooo! i was questioning if i feel the need to journal this week, but since it's becoming a bit of a tradition for me, i figured i'll keep it up
last week was oddly rough on me, as i found myself craving him a lot and feeling the strongest urge yet to break NC. luckily i powered through and am now proudly going over a month no contact 🥳
i still think of him, but it's not in an "i miss him" way, it's more like "i wish he could see me thriving". i think i just want him to see that i'm doing just fine without him and that i am no longer dependant on him. the fact that he is gone doesn't hurt as much as it used to
i have made a painful realisation though, that is that the relationship left me with horrible trust issues. i am so afraid of being mistreated again
but i've got this, i'm going forward, i'm healing ❤️
Last updated on:2025-12-08T23:29:17+05:30
Comments (5)
when you say you’re scared of being mistreated again, is it more about trusting yourself or trusting other people? sometimes those fears hit different depending on where they’re coming from.
i'm not entirely sure. i don't trust myself to fully commit because i'm afraid of feeling the same disappointment all over again. so i guess it's both? i try telling myself that when the right person comes along, i won't have to think that way, but it's scary to risk letting another wrong person in
what’s helped me with the trust issues is just taking it slow with myself, like not forcing myself to “be over it.” journaling like you’re doing is actually huge, it keeps things from building up in your head.
when i hit my first month of no contact i had that same “i wish he could see me now” energy. it’s wild how the craving hits out of nowhere even when you KNOW you’re doing better. proud of you for sticking through it
Sounds like you're on the right track. You got this!