We talked for 2 hours. Mainly me apologising for my part, and us talking about what we want to do in the future. We both mutually agreed to focus on ourselves while keeping the line of communication open.
He told me that he went bar hopping, and seeing that no women approached him made him realised he has a fear of not being desired. Hearing that broke my heart.
We said we missed each other. He said he sees a lot of emotional growth and that he doesn't think that this will be the last time we talk. He still wants us to update each other when we have our big wins. I said to let me know if you do meet someone so I can cut you off completely.
Maybe there is a path to reconciliation in the future, or the path is to more heartbreaks. I'm still glad that I had this conversation, so that I could actually let go some of my guilt. For now, I'll live my life not for him, but for myself. I actually started to like this phase of healing and self-discovery. I promised myself too that I wouldn't initiate contact with him again. Who knows, maybe I'll meet someone in the future, could be him or someone else, who will choose me for certain.
Last updated on:2025-12-11T10:48:03+05:30
Comments (4)
i’m curious, how did you feel once the call ended? like the actual feeling in your body. lighter? sad? relieved? all three?
I would say relieved and I do not feel that I wanna reach out again.
what you’re doing now… choosing yourself… that’s usually the part that actually moves life forward. keeping the line open is fine, just don’t let it pull you back into old patterns. take it slow, for you.
i had a similar “closure” talk with my ex where we said all the right things but it still left my chest heavy. that mix of hope and grief is such a mindfuck. you’re not alone in this