Well, my ex-boyfriend broke up with me a week ago because he found out his father has cancer. December is just approaching and in January we have the official university exams. The reason he gave me was that he wants to spend more time with his father before he dies, but combining the study, time with him and me is impossible. He says he's afraid of not giving me all the attention I need, so he prefers to leave him before hurting me. He also says it's a tough time for him because of the whole cancer thing and he needs time to process everything. He assured me that there is no problem with me and that he has the problem. When I told him to wait, he said that he was not sure if it was going to work because he has to organize his head, but he also half denied it. So, my question is, should I wait for him until he heals? we are still friends and see each other daily in the uni, the vibe we have is not strange and we keep talking normal, only that we no longer touch or write to each other daily. What should I do?
Last updated on:2025-12-10T03:06:27+05:30
Comments (8)
i’m wondering… are you wanting to wait because you actually want him back, or because the breakup feels sudden and unfinished? sometimes the reason changes the whole answer.
So, I've been in a relationship before but none of the previous ones made me feel like he did. I think the breakup was sudden, of course, but I really miss him and think he's the one I need
when stuff like this happened to me, giving the situation a little space usually helped. not waiting in the sense of putting my whole life on pause, just… letting things breathe and seeing how his actions look over time.
So maybe I should just give him the space he needs until he's ready to come back?
i went through something kinda similar when my ex pulled away during a family crisis. he said it was “about him, not me” and i remember how confusing that felt… like loving someone but watching them shut down anyway. it’s such a weird mix of heartbreak and compassion. i’m really sorry you’re sitting in that
He keeps saying there's nothing wrong with me, but still leaves me and he won't try again. It's such a weird feeling
Hi, so I think you should question them. What do they want? Because, you can tell yourself that you are waiting for them to heal, but what if they don’t want to heal for your relationship ? Talk with them, maybe they want time, maybe they want space, or just reassurance. And if you see that they really are just hurt and don’t really want to go away from you, then « wait ». But Idk if the term « waiting » is appropriate…I think you should just live your life, at some point I’m quite sure that in 3 years you won’t be « waiting » anymore if they don’t come back…
Talk to them ☺️
I guess but I just don't want to make things awkward. I believe that if I keep insisting, he will eventually saturate and just give up, so I don't really know what to do