I was in a relationship with a guy for about five months. We met on Instagram quickly realized we had feelings for each other and discovered we shared countless interests. In the beginning I struggled with severe anxiety from my past relationship and canceled on him a few times but he was patient and understanding since he also dealt with mental health challenges. With therapy I managed to work through most of it.
Overall it was a really good relationship. We had minor disagreements and some political differences but nothing serious we never fought. He was the most loving and supportive partner I’ve ever had. We could seamlessly shift from deep conversations about society to laughing about inside jokes or sharing our favorite bands. We had so many plans together and every moment with him felt special. As someone who has always struggled to connect with people he was one of the few I felt completely myself around.
Unfortunately in October he faced serious financial problems and his mental health declined sharply. With little family support he leaned on me and a few friends. I tried to be there for him but his struggles began to weigh heavily on our relationship. He grew distant guilty about not being able to take me out and less affectionate. At one point during a panic attack he broke up with me over text. We reconciled the next day but a week later I ended things after he ignored my messages while being active on Facebook. I need daily reassurance and being ignored triggered my fear that he would leave me again.
I later apologized with a long message admitting my irrational behavior and tried to reconcile. But this time he said it was best to end things for now and asked for no contact even though I begged for another chance.
It’s been almost a month of silence and I still feel devastated and guilty. I can’t stop thinking that I ruined a great relationship over something so small. He was a wonderful person who didn’t deserve the way I acted and I’d do anything to take back those breakup texts. I’m working on myself therapy medication the gym but none of it changes what happened. He mentioned wanting to stay friends and maybe try again when he’s in a better place financially and mentally but part of me fears he only said that to soften the blow.
Last updated on:2025-12-11T04:35:03+05:30
Comments (5)
do you think you’d actually feel safe with him right now if he suddenly came back, or would those same fears get triggered again?
i did the same thing once… broke up with someone i loved during my own panic spiral and then spent months blaming myself. it took me a long time to realize the relationship was already hurting under all that weight. your heart was trying to survive too. i’m really sorry you’re carrying all this.
if he really loved or loves you than he will come back. I think, that he maybe tries to protect you and himself from hurt. When you both struggle with your mantally and he has also financially problems, than you don't want to have anxiety of losing someone. It is easier to lose the person ones than always have the fear to losing them and in a relationship many people have this fear. My (now Ex) constantly had the fear he could lose me because of another man and I told and showed him many times that I want just him. I do it even now after the break up.
I think he just need the time. Try to give him the time. I first couldn't give my Ex time and because of that he pushed me even more away than he did at first.
I know that its hard and it's one of the hardest things to do - to let a person alone when your heart and body wants him so bad. But it is very important, that you focus on yourself and heal a little bit. He will come back, if you let him. They always do, even after years
Honestly, have you ever thought maybe its for the better? maybe God thinks this is not the best you will ever have. you will have more best things ahead of you?
You should have been strong enough the hole is back couldn't handle it that's a weak person