he got a new phone and started texting me I text back I was blunt but in the night I sent like 4 reasoning him messages because I felt bad then I felt bad about that text and the one after that and I know im stronger and I dont want to get back I dont I but I felt that pull I usually have when hes crying when hes emotional i left why do I care how he feels I know 6 years but they weren't good years I feel defeated somehow
Last updated on:2025-12-24T01:06:03+05:30
Comments (3)
when you sent those messages, were you actually missing him… or were you reacting to the guilt and the old role of being the one who soothes him?
for me, caring didn’t mean i wanted him back. it just meant my nervous system was used to putting his feelings first. that didn’t disappear overnight, even when my mind was done. it fades slower than we want.
every time he cried or got soft, that pull came back and i’d undo all my strength in one night of texts. even when i knew those years weren’t good. it messes with your head