After I broke up with my first ex my cope mechanism was kind of hatred, now with my second ex I love her too much to ever hate her but I think to cope with this I need forgiveness.
I told y'all already some things she did, and also I forgot to say like she was very jealous and even commented about some girl that commented on my post 3 years ago and I avoided that girl because she was jealous about her and everything but any time I had any type of minimum jealousy she blamed me but well.
I've been watching Vinland Saga with a friend and it kind of opened my mind about all this, I can't hate someone that once made me happy, I need to forgive everyone who've ever done bad for me and I can't ever wish bad things to happen to anyone, I don't think anyone no matter how evil they are deserve hatred, including her.
Last updated on:2026-01-01T00:22:57+05:30
Comments (6)
when you think about forgiving her, does it feel more like peace… or like you’re trying not to feel the anger because it scares you?
Kind of both, I've started to feel some sort of hate because I've got to know she just wants to experiment cuz she's young and she said that I was a wrong priority.
for me, forgiveness wasn’t about letting her off the hook. it was about not carrying the weight anymore. sometimes just saying “two things can be true, she made me happy AND she hurt me” calms my chest a little
i did the hatred thing with my first ex too, it was the only way i survived. then with the next one, same as you, i loved him too much to turn it into anger. the double standards around jealousy you described? yeah… i bent myself into shapes to keep the peace, and still got blamed. that part really HURT.
jealous mean she care love you too much not truest also drain if no boundaries been there
yeah I mean I don't care about her being jealous I respectet all her boundaries but she didn't respect mine and she said I was too much when she was more jealous than me