I recently found out from a common friend that my ex’s father passed away a few days ago. The news hit me harder than I expected because I was somewhat close to his father before, and I truly respected him. A part of me really wants to go to the wake to pay my last respects and honor the life of someone who was kind to me.
At the same time, I feel very torn. My ex and I had a painful breakup last September. He immediately went back to his ex and pursued her again, which left me deeply hurt and angry. Because of that, I eventually blocked him on all social media. Now, four months later, the thought of seeing him again, possibly with the woman he chose over me, fills me with anxiety. I’m afraid it will reopen wounds and make an already emotional situation even harder, not just for me but for everyone there.
I don’t want to make the wake uncomfortable or draw attention to myself during a time of mourning, yet I also don’t want to regret not showing up for someone who once mattered to me. What would you do in my situation? Should I go to the wake despite the pain, or is it okay to grieve and show respect from a distance to protect my peace?
Last updated on:2026-01-20T00:21:03+05:30
Comments (5)
when you imagine not going, what do you fear more. missing the chance to say goodbye, or hurting yourself by stepping back into something that already broke you
i learned that grief doesn’t have rules. showing respect doesn’t always mean physically showing up. sometimes protecting your peace IS the most respectful thing you can do for yourself and the moment
i was close to my ex’s mom, then the breakup blew everything up. when she passed, i felt that same split feeling. love and respect for her, but the thought of seeing my ex again made my chest tighten 😮💨 both can be true
if you feel like you'll regret it. go pay a visit be respectful. you're not going for your ex but because you used to care about his father.
go just for and even if you see your ex and his partner together just remember you went for a purpose maintain a distance their.
just grieve and show respect from a distance