Hey everyone it has been almost a month since my breakup, and its been incredibly hard. I think about him every waking moment. Some days my emotions feel manageable, almost steady, and other days I completely fall apart crying uncontrollably for 30 minutes at a time. The grief comes in waves, unpredictable and overwhelming.
Recently, I finally found the strength to block him everywhere. I deleted our messages and photos and put away the things he gave me. I didn’t do this out of anger or hatred. I don’t hate him at all. I did it because I knew that if I wanted to heal, I couldn’t keep reopening the wound by surrounding myself with constant reminders of him.
Almost immediately after I did this, he gave me a handwritten letter saying he wanted me back in his life. The timing felt strange and confusing, especially because he was the one who initiated the breakup. He had tried once before to leave, and that time I begged him to stay and work things out. I lowered myself in ways I never thought I would. When I think back on that moment now, it makes me recoil with shame and disbelief.
This breakup has changed me. I believe it has genuinely traumatized me. It stripped me down to my most vulnerable parts and forced me to confront pain, fear, and abandonment. I am trying to move forward, trying to heal, but the process feels messy, slow, and deeply painful. I still love him tremendously, but I don't want to give in and be hurt again.
I was wondering if any of you had any similar experience to myself.
Thank you guys 💕
Last updated on:2026-01-22T08:36:50+05:30
Comments (8)
when he sent that letter, did it feel comforting at all, or did it mostly reopen the fear of being pulled back into the same hurt again
yesss I fear being pulled back again and having my pain reopen.
i relate so much to the waves. some days i was fine, then suddenly sobbing on the floor.
i blocked my ex around the one month mark too, not out of hate but survival. and of course THAT’S when he reached out. the shame of begging before still makes my stomach drop. you’re not weak, you were attached and hurting
Take your time and don't rush anything, don't listen to social media, listen to your gut and heart.
All the best to you.
I went through something similar on and off for over a year. He'd find petty reasons to argue just so he could leave then weeks later once I'm finally healing and moving on, he'd come back .... and every time I'd take him back... and each time I'd take him back the repeated cycle got worse. The last time he left, he left me pregnant.... this heartbreak is the worst its ever been and honestly... it needed to happen... I'm finally starting to see him for who he is... yes, it still hurts and some days are better than others but I know I can get through it because I've FINALLY had enough!!!!
If your gut is telling you that he's gonna hurt you again, go with your gut!!
I really hope that helped a little.. Sending hugs 🫂 ❤️
hugs. sounds like a classic avoidant personality trait... as soon as they feel you getting over then they want back in. im not saying dont do it, but be very intentional and careful
it’s completely fine just take ur time nd feel ur pain don’t struggle with your head and don’t fight let it over think how much it will u will taw time but u will be fine