Me and my ex are in good terms, like there was and is no toxicity between us but after break up when we decided to stay as friends
after sometime he said talking is not good for us
and after 11-12 days reached out by himself to Check up on me
and then yea stopped and after some time he did again or reacted to my snap stories and he unfollowed me on insta after breaking up but no issue
he reach out once in a week or like yk 1.5 weeks, depends on him tbh, I didn't reached out by myself once
and NOW he texted me again
and tbh I don't know what to do...like I still have feelings for him but I'm trying to move on and his texts or our chats even a little triggers my attachment
he is genuinely a good guy, generally saying
buy tbh idk what's happening anymore and if I should reply
he texted on snap btw
Last updated on:2026-01-30T11:23:44+05:30
Comments (26)
why you both broke up
So umm actually it's a little long story, I wrote about it in my 1st post
you can check my acc and give me some advice? 🥹
Honestly, I feel the exact same as you. We went no contact for just under a month and he blocked me on everything. Then he reached out and emailed me a long email saying how he was sorry for being a dick and that he felt like he had to be cruel to be kind in the situation. I’m still not over him, even though I told him that the way he’s acted post break up has made me no longer recognise him as any of the person that I was in love with. So he unblocked me a few days later, only by phone number and nothing else, and after that I fell into a cycle of always being the one reaching out. Pouring my heart out and him avoiding my messages whenever it turned emotional. He came over to my flat as I invited him around and I genuinely convinced myself I could just laugh and joke and enjoy being friends again, but it was so awkward and just led to tears. Cut to last night and now we’ve gone no contact again because we both agreed that being friends hasn’t worked out the way we hoped. It’s really painful, especially when you love them and they say they just can’t go back there. I hope that you’re doing okay. I just have no idea whether with my person if there will be a future together again, when you just can’t shake the feeling that they’re your soulmate it’s crushing. But my advice would just be accept that it’s hurting you and that they won’t show the consistent effort that you want right now. Maybe later down the line, as I’m hoping my ex might eventually come back to me but even I don’t know. All the best
yeab... umm tbh idk what to say
I hope things are going fine with you and you're doing better
btw I am trying to keep distance
he's just playing tricks he just want to keep that access to you if he really wanted to fix it he would have fixed it just make it clear to him and completely disappear if he reacts good for you both of he don't then completely disappear you're mature enough to know what to do girl you gave me a good advice and now struggling with these inconvenience 😭
I have not replied and it's been a few days and I have distracted myself, tho I do miss him sometimes or get the urge bit I control it and tbh I'm doing good lol 🥲🙏🏻
so ya and I think I'll not reply to him in the future as well if he texts tho now I donno why feel like he won't coz I ignored but nvm we'll see what happens
but ya I won't entertain him anymore
even tho I still have feelings but koi baat nhi
@Sofietaekook yeah it's better to focus on your boards rn
@DreamyChill135 yeah btw Happy birthday
@Sofietaekook bro, ain't noway wasn't expecting this
@DreamyChill135 Acha 😅 lol koi na how was your day?
@Sofietaekook as always it was good ghar se clg clg se ghar then gym and day over
@DreamyChill135 Ohh chalo shi hai 🤧🤧
@Sofietaekook yeah
He definitely sounds like my ex, hes a narcissistic avoidant. He's only coming to you for validation or comfort. Once he gets his hit of dopamine, he'll disappear again and again. I went on the same cycle for 5yrs hoping in potential, but it never came. They never change. They change partners an do the same cycle.
really? damn okay then and btw I have not replied and it's been a few days and I have distracted myself, tho I do miss him sometimes or get the urge bit I control it and tbh I'm doing good
when he texts you, do you feel calm after replying, or do you spiral a bit and lose progress you’d made trying to move on
hey so I get that temporary relief while replying and for few seconds after.
then after a min or so I feel anxious, desperate and I wish to talk to him more, ofc I control myself and doesn't reach out first
so yk actually I couldn't control yesterday and opened his msg and he had texted asking how my practicals went and I said fine how's your new semester going and he said this is is quite hard and I said ohh sounds busy best of luck for your new sem
and he replied you are fine right? and I said yeah I'm fine, thanks
after that he replied later but my heart abd mind was already spiraling and taking the advice of people and chatgpt I didn't opened his dm since last night and cleared his chat from my snap chat feed...
btw i was replying after sometime of him texting, just saying
this sounds less about him being a good guy and more about how his popping in keeps reopening the wound.
yeah that it is!
the on-and-off check-ins, reacting to stories, disappearing again. my ex was “nice” too, no toxicity, but every message pulled me right back into attachment mode. that confusion messed with my head
yeahh
haven't*
Don't answer if you keep answering and answering he's going to see that your not over him and that let's him know your around his fingers so whenever his needs someone to talk your there which it's bad but still there's more people in the world to talk too your still young so go enjoy your life try doing things you happen tried. xoxo
ohh okah
thank you a lot 💗
@Sofietaekook yes yess