Goodbye my first love 😭

Author

Hello, someone who is no longer in my world. Today was my first night shift at the hospital. It was hard. I even ran into my doctor from the clinic there, I was so awkward (you would know who I'm talking about). After 3 months of quitting smoking, I relapsed. I've already bought my third pack, and I hope it will be my last. I was able to quit you, but smoking was not - because it reminds me of those happy times with you. But the number 3 is symbolic for me, because your birthday is on March 3rd. And this will be my last farewell pack. I loved you sincerely, and in return I received betrayal, and then blows. I am burying the love I had for you. It's not my fault that I couldn't stand it anymore, forgive me.

Last updated on:2026-01-28T15:38:37+05:30

Comments (11)

ChillZone610
ChillZone610 a mth ago

He treated me nicely till the last day he chose to break up with me......... I had cheated on him twice 😔, but he was also not OK with me having male friends, it's been 8 days, and it feels like hell in my chest 😔, How do you all cope with not hearing from them? Not knowing how their day went? Every memory feels like reopening a wound? How do you cope guys? 🥺, To him I was just never loyal enough, logical enough, understanding enough, always dismissive to his feelings......... He literally cloned my phone, hacked into it and tracked every single activity in my phone, privacy was something I never got, and I never knew about it, I just knew the day he broke up with me.......... I don't know how to deal with all of this😔

LostSoul02
LostSoul02 a mth ago

I turned on the recorder and imagined that I was talking to him on the phone

ChillZone610
ChillZone610 a mth ago

@LostSoul02 I chat with my WhatsApp, imagining that it's him reading and just leaving me on read, as if that might help 😣

NotHealed
NotHealed a mth ago

when you say you’re burying the love, does it feel more like letting go, or like you’re forcing yourself to close something that still hurts to touch

LostSoul02
LostSoul02 a mth ago

I don't know...

magnum
magnum a mth ago

first night shifts are brutal on their own. add heartbreak and it’s a lot.

LostSoul02
LostSoul02 a mth ago

Thank you

viomakillo
viomakillo a mth ago

this wrecked me. i relapsed too after quitting something that was tied to him. cigarettes, places, routines. it felt like losing him twice. that mix of love and betrayal hits so deep

LostSoul02
LostSoul02 a mth ago

Today Mom brought over the very grape variety we wanted to try. It's delicious.

LostSoul02
LostSoul02 a mth ago

I know you left me completely cold-bloodedly, I'm sure you're not even suffering, but rather, most likely, carried away by your new passion. It's me who's shedding rivers of tears.

LostSoul02
LostSoul02 a mth ago

No more love, no more Sunrise and Sunset together...