His capacity for love feels... Weird. It's like he's guided by his feelings, rather than his head.
For me, love was about commitment rather than butterflies on one's stomach, "burning desire" as he expressed. I always felt this steady quiet love, I wanted to stay with him for the rest of my life. I would have never abandoned him, my love for him was always intense in my own way.
But for him, if he doesn't feel as intensely, he breaks up. I took him the first time and he apologized, we were trying to rebuild, now he does that the second time. I do think about taking him back if he wanted to, but for now it seems like it's for good.
I'm not a very good person, maybe if I were perfect, our relationship would still be possible. But it doesn't make sense how mistakes make you just completely fall out of love with someone else. I'd understand a "I love you, but you hurt me too much" or a "I love you, but I think that we're incompatible" than "I simply stopped feeling anything for you. I stopped thinking about you in my future". That... That seems cruel. I know he was being just honest, but that felt so cruel to me. I'd walk away with more dignity if it was something we both tried and it failed, but him just telling me he feels nothing?? After so many times, he said "You're my soulmate", "I'm never leaving you again", "You're my happiness" now here we are. I guess it were his feelings talking, instead of his actual priorities.
I feel like all my effort, love and commitment was akin to trash.
Last updated on:2026-02-02T19:31:37+05:30
Comments (5)
you say “i’m not a very good person,” whose voice is that really? yours, or the one you absorbed trying to make sense of him leaving?
my ex was also all about feelings and intensity, not follow-through. when the butterflies dipped, he dipped. meanwhile i was loving him in the quiet, committed way, the “i’m still here even when it’s boring or hard” way. being told “i just don’t feel anything anymore” after promises like soulmate and forever… that shit rewired something in me. it hurts in a very specific, cruel way.
It does... I don't think I trust people very much with the commitment of love anymore💔
Girl... don't blame yourself for your relationship failing. Nobody is perfect! Take this time to self-reflect about whether there was anything you did in this relationship that you need to work on so you can be a better version of yourself moving forward, but do not let this relationship define who you are as a person! Hang in there 🫶
Thank you!! 😊 It's all still very fresh, so I have a lot to reflect on. I definitely notice patterns of mine that did contribute to the downfall of the relationship, and I do hope to get over them