me and him have been on and off for so long but since i loved him so much i just couldn’t leave but the more he broke my trust and he only wanted an easy relationship where he wouldn’t take accountability i had to leave but doing that is killing me right now, because i just want to text him again even though it wouldn’t solve anything, he is a nice guy just everything he does make me question if he even loves me and comming to that point hurts.
Last updated on:2026-02-23T17:07:39+05:30
Comments (7)
when you say he’s a nice guy, is he actually kind to you consistently? or is he nice in general but confusing with you?
He genuinely is a nice guy but his actions are confusing, like i ask him for the bare minimum to communicate with me, spend time with me but he acts like its a inconvenience to him but he claims to love me but couldn’t change his behavior, and everytime he did something nice was after i asked him to do it like buy me flowers and i would just make excuses over his behavior that he has a tough childhood and thats why he treated me the way he treated me but idk it all was so confusing being with him but i was to attached to actually see the relationship wasn’t healthy for me
i get the urge to text. that pull is REAL.
ugh. i feel this in my bones. i was on and off with someone for YEARS because i loved him so much i couldn’t walk away. every time he broke my trust, i’d tell myself “but he’s a nice guy.” and that’s what kept me stuck. the no accountability part is what drained me the most. i kept questioning if he even loved me too. leaving felt like i was ripping my own heart out. but staying was slowly killing me. both hurt, but one at least protected me
Thank you for this, reading this made me feel like im not alone in my situation
It's a very difficult situation with no clear answer. No amount of advice I could pull from thin air could give you the clear definitive answer. I grapple with contacting my ex too yet she chooses to maintain her distance so I respect it. A part of me hopes that the silence helps us. Another part of me is reluctantly sliding into the belief that this silence will create such a distance that what we had will be gone forever. But I also realize this attachment. This pull to immediately leap to talk to her. That overbearing love is the reason I'm in this mess. Because you get so used to having a second voice throughout your every day you forget how to sit in quiet and be yourself. So I figure we're in a similar boat. This silence is something heavy, almost unbearable but perhaps something necessary so that you can find yourself again. Time to yourself so you can relearn how to navigate life as yourself and also time to feel whether your attachment is a healthy one or one of almost trauma bonded addiction. So even though it's hard and tough. I think maintaining no contact is worth the pains it brings.
Thank you for your caring comment, it came just on a perfect timing, i really had the urge to break the no contact barrier but reading your comment made me rethink and yeah though it hurts like hell right now and i wish i was with him that pain i will later be grateful for and for now bare with it so thank you a lot.