it's honestly kinda... complicated, and explaining everything would take a while, but around dec 2024 he started dating my ex bsf (we were friends for like 8 years, shes the one that introduced me to him) and she was his.. 3rd or 4th girlfriend since we'd broken up, and they lasted like 8/9 months, hence why me and him didn't talk, well he texted me after they broke up (I was kinda stalking their socials so I knew they'd broken up already but I didn't text him when I found out) and yk eventually we got to talking (around sep 16th I think) and he told me he didn't want a rls or anything (ps. between his rls he texts me and tells me basically everything that went wrong, I know too much about his relationships after me and him and it's not from stalking 🤦♀️) and we talked for a few weeks, until like late Oct/early November, and then he told me he'd been talking to a girl but was waiting till his bday (in dec) and we stopped talking maybe 2 weeks before they got together (he was also talking with his other ex gf, my ex bsf and when she found out he was talking to a girl she got pissed) but him and that girl have been tg since (dec 29.) and maybe like, 2 weeks if that after he'd blocked me (on Instagram) he ended up unblocking me, and around... 14 days ago? maybe 15/16 he viewed my stories on Instagram, I brushed it off just thinking it was a mistake, went about my day, well about 12 days ago he called me (from a friend's phone, I had his number blocked) and he called me until I answered, left a voicemail on one of the times I didn't (just being stupid nothing serious) and when I hung up on him he called again, I couldn't really understand what he was saying but yeah, and that kinda.. rattled me I guess, but I tried to forget it, and then a couple days later he viewed my story again, I blocked him recently cause I don't wanna deal with that, but I checked his profile when he called me, and he still has her initial in his bio, they're still tg, but he's also reposting things that suggested he doesn't want to be with her anymore (idk if he just picks the wrong girls, or has commitment issues or what but whatever) but I don't want him contacting me while he has a girlfriend (I'm very aware I need to get over him, and I've tried but it's a lil difficult when he contacts me every few months 😓) I know this is long, and this isn't even all, but if you've read all this, any advice? (besides the obvious, get over him, move on, Etc.) such as, why is he even contacting me? I get it when he's single, lonely or whatever, but he's not so what gives? he's the one that urdges me to get over him Everytime we go no contact, so wtf is he doing?
Last updated on:2026-03-13T01:34:03+05:30
Comments (7)
this whole thing feels messy and confusing, i get why you’re rattled. when he called from his friend’s phone and kept trying till you answered, what did it feel like in that moment, did it pull old feelings back or just make you tired of the cycle?
blocking him like you did is exactly what finally helped me. my ex loved keeping that little door open while dating other people, and the only way i got peace was shutting the door myself and leaving it shut.
I don't think he's talked to me while he's had a girlfriend in a while tbh, maybe for the first girlfriend or two until ig he finally learned you shouldn't talk to your ex while in a rls, idk I don't really well, but I think that's what bothers me the most about this whole situation, it's another girls boyfriend, not just my ex, it's... gross? but idk maybe he was just hanging out with friends and being stupid, either way it bothers me
my ex used to pop back into my life every few months too, call, watch my stories, then disappear back to whoever he was dating. it messes with your head because just when you start settling, they show up again
Did you ever get over it? if so, how?
maybe you're his phantom ex
I've never heard this term, what's it mean?