I'm rather looking at that day - for me, May 24 - as I would Christmas morn, imagining freedom of a sort. Less emotional energy spent on this guy. More energy spent on me and my life goals. Less things that will trigger me. Less days where I stumble. More Me days.
I'm thinking I will take myself out that day and do something special for me.
I envision being my whole me again. Yes, scarred, but wounds more or less healed.
A stronger, wiser, more resilient me.
What do YOU envision on your 90th day? Comment below. :-)
Last updated on:2026-04-01T21:41:17+05:30
Comments (10)
Yes, but this day will be the worst. This is the end. From here, you will steadily rise up, regaining YOUR life, YOUR worth. As the saying goes, Darkest before the dawn. Hold fast to that belief and slowly walk on. You can do this.
I’m feeling so bad
I want to text him
we were together 7 years
and lived together the last 4 years
today his employee came and took his stuffs from the home
I’m feeling so sad
what do you think “being your whole self again” actually looks like for you day to day?
The person I was before I met him, but now, I think BETTER because I have been through this experience, have realized why I was attracted to this man, and am damn proud I stood my ground and let him know there is a red line in the sand I will not cross. The whole me now is more confident than I've ever been before. I'm not saying I won't still miss the idea of him. But I will walk on knowing Im on the right path without him.
counting down like that too, like each day was a step back to myself. my 90th day didn’t feel perfect but it felt… quieter, like my mind finally stopped looping his name all the time.
This morning, Day 35, was the first morning where I opened my eyes and my first thought was NOT about him. A major victory for me. For you, too, right. The start of not expending so much mental energy on these people who don't deserve our energy.
I’m on day 14
and feeling so restless
missing him
have an urge to text him
all day in bed
it’s so bad
after a 7 year toxic relationship I’m just feeling empty
Do NOT text. Please, dont. That will give him the power, the control you've just lost and he will still be gone from your life. Tip: everytime you feel the urge to text, drop your phone and go drink a glass of water REALLY SLOWLY. You need to break the habit, the dopamine "fix" you got when you both talked.
what is now feel like?
the day 34?
Day 34:
I don't think of him as much as I did at the start.
When I'm busy doing something, I don't think of him at all.
I don't check my notifications as much.
I see clearly the red flags that were present.
I focus on how he hurt me, not on the small efforts he made to be a gentleman.
But here are the lingering issues:
I am still have emotional exhaustion - spending too much of my daily energy ruminating about the why - which is hampering my ability to focus on my work.
When I'm tired, my emotions about him become stronger.
New Habits/Thoughts:
I still research his thought process to protect myself from being hurt by him again.
I do not regret calling him out on his behaviour in that last text. He needed to know my red line even if it caused this silent treatment, his fleeing.
I have a new-found confidence that what I said was right. No woman before me had called him out on his behaviour because they wanted the prestige of being his partner.
I paid put to that noise. He either tops the line or we stay No Contact 'til hell freezes over, and if that's the case, no matter my grief, I'll don a gorgeous, warm coat and relish the hellacious cold!
My healthy worthy self will always win.
He will remain psychologically broken.