my ex broke up with me on february and it’s been messing with me ever since. a month before that i started pulling back a bit because i was mentally drained and dealing with stuff at home and with school which she knew about. around valentine’s day she said she already had plans with her mom and when i tried to see her the next couple of days she avoided me. later she started an argument over messenger and i apologized because i still cared a lot.
after that she told me she’d been questioning for months if we even worked together and said we felt more like friends even though just a week before she told me she loved me. we kept texting and sending reels for about a month after the breakup but it never felt the same. eventually i told her i couldn’t keep pretending we were just casual after everything we had and that it was better to cut contact. she replied saying the connection had already been gone for a while.
this was my first serious relationship and i know i made mistakes too. i didn’t always open up about what i was going through because she had her own struggles and i didn’t want to add to it. still i tried my best to be there for her. even now i can’t bring myself to be angry at her i just keep thinking about the good moments.
after the breakup we had a brief talk about private stuff we shared and she said she trusted me but i still removed her because it was too much for me. on social media she deleted one photo of us but kept the rest and now she’s posting a lot more sometimes sad things about love and loneliness other times acting like she’s fine. i also see her spending time gaming with other guys and it just adds to my confusion.
i ended up unfollowing her everywhere because it was getting overwhelming. i still love her deeply and can’t get her out of my head. we were together for over two years and i really thought we had a future. i’ve started therapy and going to the gym but i’m struggling badly panic attacks no sleep lost a lot of weight and my mind keeps replaying everything or imagining what i’d say if we met again. we’re supposed to see each other soon with mutual friends and i don’t even know if i’m in the right state for that.
i feel like there’s so much left unsaid. part of me knows it wasn’t all my fault but i still carry that guilt. i feel lost confused by her mixed signals and at the same time i miss her more than anything. i don’t know what to do anymore every day just feels heavy and i feel like i’m losing myself.
Last updated on:2026-04-03T16:36:03+05:30
Comments (3)
do you feel like seeing her soon would actually help you, or are you hoping it might bring some kind of closure you’re still chasing?
man, this sounds heavy… the panic attacks, no sleep, losing weight, i’ve been there and i had to step back from anything that kept me tied to her, even mutual hangouts.
i feel this in my bones… that switch from “i love you” to “we feel like friends” messed me up too. i kept replaying every moment trying to find where it broke, like i must’ve missed something. that kind of confusion really HURTS.