I met a girl and we immediately clicked

I met a girl and we immediately clicked. We had such special times. My self confidence has never been great and she struggled with anxiety and eds, pots and other disabilities. I loved her no matter what and I was always there. We went away for Valentines day my birthday and her birthday. But because of her disabilities paired with my weight I found it hard to approach intimacy in the bedroom. We tried to once but my own anxiety beat me. Recently it got harder to see her due to our jobs and her house rules put on her by an overbearing Mother. I li e with my Dad since Mom died last year and the house is a work in progress, but it is getting there. There were times where i was supposed to go over and her Mom would have a row due to her own mental health problems around thinking the house was a mess and make everyones life a misery, so it got cancelled. She was supposed to come round mine to see me one Sunday but ended up being roped into going shopping with her Mom. What was supposed to be an hour turned into most of the day. She did come around but only stayed for 30 mins. This upset me as we didn't see each other as much as I liked and spoke on the phone a lot more than we saw each other at that time. I commented hopefully i'll see you more soon over text and she said sorry it wasn't enough. Two days later she requested we meet which we did, and she told me it wasn't working, we both made mistakes, and that her older uncle had a fall and needed looking after (which she did with all family), and also starting a new job with training etc would mean she would have even less time. I said some things out of pain that I regret. I dont agree with her decision as I wouldn't have given up on her. We had planned to go to the gym together aswell and she always tried to en ourage healthy eating. I joined the gym prior to splitting up, and after we split still decided to go and even started eating better. I put positive quotes and how it was going over social media. She accused me of being happier without her when all I was doing was being positive. I tried explaining this to her. The days that followed i stupidly sent her an i miss you message to no reply, the next day I sent a goodbye message saying that i'd always love her and i think we are great together, again to no reply. I didn't message her after that at all, until she contacted me wanted an old case back from mine. Which we sorted. I said to her that I haven't blocked you i just need some no contact. In which she said I think you need no contact. Days later I am unfriended and blocked. I'm trying to get on positively, I am going to the gym 6 out of 7 days per week and i'm eating a lot better and cooking from ingredients. I have lost nearly 2 stone in a month of going through this breakup. My bereavement counciling has also began, so hopefully i can overcome and deal with them issues. I still miss her so much and I keep breaking down. The dreams i'm having of her are killing me nearly every morning. I'm doing the positive things but I feel no happiness doing the things I love. I have accepted the break up but i'll never agree that it couldn't have worked out. I wish i had started these positive changes whilst we were together. It kills me to think i'll never speak to her again.

Last updated on:2025-08-04T04:27:03+05:30