I posted photos from my holidays (still out here on holiday) to my Instagram story and he is active cause I can see and he posted something on his story too. Now he does not post at all, like barely. Can happen he will post once a month if even onto his story. But he has been active all this time, even posting his own story and did not view mine... do you think he is avoiding viewing mine on purpose? or is he just busy? I Almost viewed his story.. decided not to for now....
Last updated on:2026-02-19T02:13:19+05:30
Comments (7)
if he had viewed it immediately, would that have made you feel better?
when i start analyzing story views, it’s usually a sign i’m still attached. and that’s okay. but i try not to assign meaning to it because my brain will ALWAYS choose the worst story. sometimes they avoid it. sometimes they’re just scrolling mindlessly
Thank you so much guys, this advice means the world to me <3
posting a cute pic when i was away and then spiraling because he was online, posting memes, liking stuff… but didn’t watch mine. it felt so intentional. like “you can see i exist but you’re choosing not to look.” that part stung way more than it should’ve. i refreshed that viewer list more times than i’ll admit
A Note for You: Reclaiming Your Peace
I can feel how much this is weighing on you. When we are in the middle of a breakup, every "unviewed" story or active status feels like a personal slight or a hidden clue we need to solve. Whether he is avoiding your stories on purpose or is simply distracted, the result is the same: it leaves you feeling anxious and stuck.
I want to offer some perspective on why stepping back—and perhaps unfollowing or blocking—is actually an act of deep self-love rather than an act of "being mean."
The Science of Moving On
There is a biological reason why "just checking" hurts so much. Every time you look at his profile, read an old message, or wonder why he hasn't viewed your story, you are firing old neural pathways in your brain.
Wiring Your Brain: Think of these pathways like well-worn hiking trails. By checking up on him, you keep those trails clear and easy to walk on. Your brain stays chemically attached to the "old" version of your life.
Creating New Paths: To heal, you need those old trails to grow over. You need to build new pathways that don't involve him. Every time you choose not to look, you are literally re-wiring your brain to find happiness elsewhere.
The "20-Minute" Rule
The urge to check his story or see if he’s seen yours can feel like an emergency. It feels like an itch you have to scratch.
But here is a secret: The peak intensity of a craving—the desperate need to check or message—usually only lasts about 20 minutes. Next time that "need" hits you:
Acknowledge it: "I'm feeling the urge to check right now."
Distract yourself: Set a timer for 20 minutes. Go for a walk, listen to a podcast, or grab a coffee.
Wait it out: By the time the timer goes off, the physical "need" will have faded. You’ll feel stronger for having ridden the wave.
Why "No Contact" is Your Superpower
Blocking or unfollowing isn't about being "dramatic." It’s about protecting your energy. When you unfollow, you stop being a detective. You stop wondering why he's active but not looking at your holiday photos. You take the power back. You are on a beautiful holiday right now—you deserve to be present in that sunshine, rather than staring at a screen wondering about someone who isn't there with you.
The choice is yours: Do you want to keep the old pathways strong, or are you ready to start building the new ones?
You have the strength to let go, one 20-minute window at a time
Consider downloading the audiobook or picking up a copy of "It’s Called a Breakup Because It’s Broken" by Greg Behrendt. * Why it helps: It’s famous for being straightforward, funny, and incredibly honest. I've read it a few times.
The Benefit: It will give you something to focus on other than his "Active" status. Instead of analyzing his silence, you can spend those hours on the plane laughing a little and learning how to truly let go.
You’ve got this. Use that flight to start your new chapter. ✈️✨
. Enjoy the rest of your trip—you deserve to be the main character of your own holiday.
I really appreciate this because I needed it, sometimes I'm stucked, I don't wanna move on just wanna know about'er. you're right no contact is my strength, my superpower.
@Jeiser I feel the same way too sometimes. You aren't alone. Sometimes I just want my ex back so the pain will go away. whenever my ex pops into my head I tell myself the affirmation I know this is hard but I will get through this. I just keep repeating that instead of thinking about them. I know you are strong and that you will get through this. I believe in you. ♥️