My ex always used to say, ‘I’m not your emotional support animal.’ So, I finally took his advice!
I realized I’d rather have 5 lbs of weighted panda on my chest than 180 lbs of dead weight on my soul. After years of doing the work, the counseling, and the self-regulation, I’m done being made to feel ashamed for having human emotions. I traded the gaslighting for some high-quality fluff and deep-pressure therapy. Meet my new ESA: He’s silent, he’s weighted, and unlike the previous occupant of this spot, he actually knows how to hold space without making it about himself.
Last updated on:2026-02-25T03:02:11+05:30
Comments (12)
when he’d say that line, did you start shrinking yourself to avoid hearing it again
I started to make myself smaller. I felt dismissed and unseen when he would say I'm not your emotional support animal. I felt like I wasn't good enough for him and that my emotions were too big. Thank you for your follow-up question.
the moment i stopped feeling ashamed for having normal human emotions… everything shifted. not overnight, but slowly. the shame was heavier than the breakup.
I agree. there's nothing worse than when people try to. shame you for having emotions because they are not comfortable with yours or their own. I read in a book once that if somebody calls you too sensitive, tell them I'm just sensitive enough. that has really helped me to stand up to people when they try to dismiss my feelings. Thank you for sharing your story.
the “i’m not your emotional support animal” line just punched me in the gut my ex used to say almost the exact same thing anytime i had feelings that were inconvenient for him. like me having emotions was a burden. i did YEARS of therapy too, trying to be “less needy.” turns out i wasn’t needy. i was asking the wrong person for care. trading gaslighting for a weighted panda? honestly iconic. i love this for you
Thank you for showing your story. it helps to know that I'm not alone and that my feelings are valid. it used to break my heart when my ex would say this. I agree. I think we are both asking the wrong person for care. thank you for your kind words.
girl you do you, no judgment! love it!
Thank you for the kind words and support.
so comforting
ohhh I want to do that too
let me know if you want me to send you the website.
That isn't me in the photo.